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Should I have an abortion tomorrow? NO BASHING PLEASE

don't come on here to preach - I'm not religious, so the "god" arguement is silly. I am torn, really torn and have an appointment in the morning.

I'll keep it short -- My x-bf has been unemployed forever, has a job out of town right now, he lives at MY house and refuses to leave. I have 3 kids age 5 and under. Bf treats me terribly, tells me I'm a bad mom, tells kids bad things about me. We have no money, no food, 6 months behind on mortgage. I'm in school full time so I can support kids alone in 4-5 years.

If I have this child, I'll probably loose my house, BF says he's taking our daughter already threatening the other kid.
I think I can stay in school, but can't work preg or with a newborn. I hav eno family or anyone free to watch them. I want so bad for BF to leave, but if I'm preg I can't be all alone with 3 kids.

I'd love for the situation to be different so I could have this baby. BF will NOT allow adoption

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:38 PM on Nov. 11, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (41)
  • i say abort the boyfriend

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:40 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • i understand ur situation, if your bf is ur ex and he cant even get a job to support this baby then he really cant say anything about adoption. You should atleast give this baby a chance and have it adopted. Forget what he says hes not doing anything for you or this unborn baby. Dont have an abortion this baby doesnt deserve that the baby deserves to live so you should think about that.

    Answer by Tracey1988 at 9:42 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Go down to your foodstamp office. Tell them your situation. You can get foodstamps, medical coverage, and TANF, which is cash. You can do this. And you can make your ex move. Get through school, get a job, and then get off public assistance. It's there hon, use it.

    Answer by Gremlyn at 9:42 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Kick that loser out and put the baby up for adoption if your xBF wants to fight it let him but then he has to be willing to raise the child on his own which come on yeah right he obviously cannot take care of himself. Make up an eviction notice giving him 30 days have him sign it and the take it to the notery if he refuses to sign have someone witness you giving it to him and have them sign as a witness. Do not feel trapped you are strong and you need to believe that and respect yourself enough to get out of this vile relationship. Like I was saying speak with an adoption agency first, if it is not a choice honestly I would have the abortion.

    Answer by PsychMommie at 9:43 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Oh wow, that is a tough one! I'm not religious either, so you're not getting the God card here. If I personally was in your shoes, I think I would see what the state laws are for adoption, regardless of what your ex says. But I don't believe in abortion when there are so many couples that want to adopt because they can't have children. Goodluck with your decision. Make sure you give it lots of thought, and don't rush into something you might regret later.

    Answer by Amy75972 at 9:43 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • ok, you're so sad, I'm sorry mommy. Look into distant learning classes over the computer from a community college - sometimes they're done entirely from home over the computer even testing.
    Plus they're inexpensive.

    If it's your home that you own or rent is into your name, talk to a lawyer and have proof of your hardwork. If his name is not on the mortgage or lease he doe not have a right to stay there if you want him gone. Community colleges also have organizations sometimes called Displaced Homemakers that help women make decisions and train for the working world.

    Hope things get better for you!

    Answer by lfl at 9:43 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Given your situation, I think it might be a good idea. I was in the same situation a loooong time ago, and I made the decision to end the pregnancy.
    It's a very tough decision, and it's a horrible thing to have to go through but if you feel that it's your only option, and it's what is right for you and your family, then you should do it. (I wouldn't tell anyone that they SHOULD have an abortion, obviously-the decision is yours to make.)
    I hope your situation gets better, and I'll think good thoughts for you tomorrow, no matter what you chose. My heart goes out to you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • It sounds like you WANT this baby...just not the situation. I agree with the above posters. There are options out there for you. Please use them and give this baby life. I promise you won't regret it! Hugs!

    Answer by Nika75 at 9:44 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • I would leave the boyfriend and if you can't afford a baby, adoption is always a choice.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Maybe you should consider killing one of your three children instead.

    Sound drastic? This is what you will be doing to YOUR unborn child who is a part of you.

    Why would you kill your child because your BF is an ass?

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

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