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5 months preg. and need advice!

well my dh and i seporated and i moved out and lived with my sis for a while. he would still come around to see the kids and leave some things for them and leave. well i meet some other guy and started dating him and thought everything was going to be good then. my dh and i were talking one day and decided to work it out for our kids. then thats when i found out that i was prego. and explaind it to him that he might not be the father. pretty hard but we are still together and things are going good so far. but we really havn't talked about what if he is not the dad what is going to happen. how do i start a conversaion or talk about this without arguing?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:34 PM on Nov. 11, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Two the two anons above: if you're going to be a stupid cunt, remember the people on Jerry aren't afraid to show their faces on camera.

    So... he already knows this is a possibility... what did he say when you told him? He's still coming around, that's good. You didn't do anything wrong... you acted on what was going on at the time. You couldn't have known how things would turn out, and why would you put your life on hold just in case?

    I was in your shoes. Boyfriend #1 and I agreed that no matter what DNA, we would raise the baby as ours and not even worry about it. My daughter looks exactly like #2.

    You're going to have to talk about it... better now than when baby is already here. You have to plan a few things and it will help to know what you can count on him for. Also if baby does not turn out to be DH's, you need to think about what you will tell baby, if anything, and when. Etc.

    Feel free to PM me...
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 4:40 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • i would just ask him one day when you feel it is a good time to talk and say "how do you feel this will effect our relationship if the baby is not your" i think if you can get him to talk about it things will work out the best way possible for you
    Sami_lue87

    Answer by Sami_lue87 at 11:38 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • just to make it more clear we stayed away not even a month. i know some of you moms are going to say stuff but im not the only one that is going through this. call me a whore but dnt care. but still dnt know if he is.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:40 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • Why bother? my bio dad ran off and my mom started dating the man i call my dad when she was 3 months pregnant. He never treated me like i wasn't his. In fact, I didn't know that I wasn't his until they told me when I was 20! He loved my mom, he loved me and so he adopted me. If it doesn't bother him that he's not the bio dad, then there's no reason to make a big deal about it. IMO.
    sadiesmom87

    Answer by sadiesmom87 at 11:41 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • This isn't exactly something you can ignore. I know things happen, you are not a whore, and obviously if you've already told him that he may not be the father, he understands that too. But you still need to address the situation. I can't begin to tell you how to do that, a lot depends on how he is acting and feeling towards you. You need to gauge the situation and figure out the best way to bring it up without starting a fight. If he is acting like he really wants to work things out, then maybe tell him it doesn't matter who the bio father is, that you want him to be the father (even though, you didn't say if you do or not. I guess that is up to you.) But make sure he knows that you are ready to work on this HARD, and do whatever he feels is in his and the baby's best interest. Good luck.
    Iskkra

    Answer by Iskkra at 11:46 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • sorta in the same boat, ask him with out bringing it up if he wants to do a DNA test when the child is born
    miss_nevin

    Answer by miss_nevin at 11:59 PM on Nov. 11, 2009

  • we are going to do a DNA when the baby is born but just scared on what the results are going to be. Can you tell right away if they are the fathers if they look like them? Cause thats what he is going to do just ceck if it looks like him and if not then dont know what will happen.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:28 AM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • LOL thats funny, I could tell with my girls kid that it wasnt her mans.. lol it depents on how different the dads are and its really not a died give away.. mine are gonna be cause of different races.. but other then that its not a 100% DNA test are only like 125 online and they come back in 5 days..
    miss_nevin

    Answer by miss_nevin at 12:58 AM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • JERRY JERRY JERRY!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:02 AM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • LOL JERRY JERRY JERRY!! Hahahaha
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 AM on Nov. 12, 2009

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