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SAHM and Working Mom Question

I'm about to experience a both pretty soon-sort of. I stayed home with my first child and I plan on staying home for the first couple months with this next one on the way but will continue to go to school.

Have you ever done both? HAve you been a SAHM and a working mom? Which did you prefer? Did you feel guilty for leaving your child to go to work? Did you feel wrestless when you stayed home? What were the reason or being a SAHM and/or a WM?

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Imogine

Asked by Imogine at 6:15 PM on Nov. 12, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 22 (14,425 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • i did both, i prefer to be w/ my kids.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:23 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I went to college part time most of the time. I usually had the semester off when the baby was born. By the time my youngest was 2.5 I was a full-time doctoral student.

    I enjoyed going to college and was never gone very long. When my babies were young I would usually figure out a way for my class to be during a time when they usually were asleep. Even when I was a full-time student I was able to do a lot from home and we homeschooled. I was a single mother.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 6:28 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • When my son was 15 mos old, his dad had a "brain-fart" and took off. I returned to work then because I HAD to. I hated it. Even though my son was left in the care of my parents... I hated it. I know people don't like the phrase... but *TO ME* leaving a child in the care of others for 8+hrs/day *IS* (again, to me) having someone else raise that child... and that's not why I had them.

    I continued working until my 2nd son was born --- about 2 1/2 yrs. When I went on maternity leave about 2 wks before he was born... that was it. I never looked back.

    I'm now a SAHM of 4 - ages 2 - 11. I get restless, sure - anyone who says they don't is lying - but I get "me time" on weekends & sometimes in the evenings.
    Laura1229

    Answer by Laura1229 at 6:28 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I work in a school, so I kind of do both. I work during the school year and sah during the summer and school holidays. I am a much better mom when I get a break from my kids by being at school. I really love my job and the kids I work with (teens with special needs), and I find that during the school year - even though I am usually more tired - I have more patience with my own kids. I really don't feel guilty leaving my kids. My older two are in school anyway, so they wouldn't be home, and my youngest goes to my mil's where he is spoiled by Granny all day. Plus all day is from 8:30 to 3ish, so it's really not that long. In all honesty, while I can't afford to stay home, I also don't want to. Like I said I feel like I am a better mom as a wohm, so really it is better for *my* kids to have a working mom.
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 7:07 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • No other place I would rather be than at home. When I get restless I schedule a time to go out with my sister or the girls. Sometimes I will even go stroll at the mall an hour just to get out of the house.
    oliviahank

    Answer by oliviahank at 7:20 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I have gone form a full time worker to a part time worker. I personally, though I would like to lessen my hours more in the future, could not imagine not working. I love my kids to the ends of the Earth but I thoroughly enjoy my job. So though I have no 'valid' answer to this question I just want to through out there that it really depends on the job you have/had and how much you enjoy(ed) it.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 7:28 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I love being a sahm, but I haven't ever been a working mom, so I can't compare the two. I do have adult outlets, but I limit them. I believe that these tiny years are so short, and yeah, playing trains gets old after a while. However, I take time to savor it. I homeschool my kids, too. I enjoy watching my 2 year old light up when she learns something, and get super excited to tell her daddy when he gets up / gets home (he works night shift). Now, I managed to miss my 1 year old's first steps, lol. I was in the bathroom. I think I've seen every other first, and it is a treasure to me.

    I do not think working moms are bad or that they don't love their children. I know so many are working to put food on a table, not a fancy car in the driveway, and I admire how hard they work and the sacrifices they make, too. I don't understand needing a 40 hour a week break, though. I wouldn't enjoy it. I love being with my children
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 8:23 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I have three young boys, I worked a full time job with my first two (my mother in law watched them most days), I remember getting a text message when it was snowing and I was stuck in a lab at work ...it was a picture of my two boys playing outside in the snow (it was my babies first time EVER seeing snow), I got really upset and called my husband, I missed that moment in Rileys life, I always felt like I was missing the little parts of their childhood. So when I found out I was pregnant with our third son I told my husband that I needed to stay home with my babies. I told my husband that we didn't have kids so someone else could take care of them. I have been a SAHM of a year now and I love it! Yes, it's sometimes stressful and I want to "get away" every now and then but I seriously wouldn't change anything now, I LOVE BEING WITH MY BOYS!
    Jen5454

    Answer by Jen5454 at 11:37 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I loved staying home with my daughter the first couple years of her life. I loved every minute, the good times and the challenging times. It was always nice and I miss that time with her now that she's in daycare and I'm going to school ful time, but it would happen eventually.

    Now that I'm pregnant again I do plan on staying home for the first couple months but I plan on returning to school in the fall part-time atleast. Maybe take one class so I can be home more. I just know I'm gonna wanna be home though.
    Imogine

    Answer by Imogine at 12:34 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

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