Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Is my relationship something I should worry about?

My boyfriend and I have been together for about 5 years. I met him when I was 15 and he was 18. He is my high school sweet heart, my first at everthing and I was his first ago. We have been living together for 3 of the 5 years and have a one year old son. We are also happy to find out im pregnant with our little girl. I love our little family and hope one day he would marry me. He dont believe in the whole marrage thing and thinks we are fine the way we are. I dont! I want to marry him and we have try.
Before my son or moving in together, I plan a small wedding and got the help from my family. We had everything plan to just find out he didnt want to get marry no more. My family hated him and told me I should just leave him. I cant see my life without him, and to think about it makes me what to cry. Should I worry that he dont want to get marry? or just live my life as it?

Answer Question
 
i_am_ur_kittie

Asked by i_am_ur_kittie at 6:36 PM on Nov. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Level 4 (43 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • sorry, but you've already given him everything without having to marry you! you live together, are about to give him his 2nd child. why buy the cow when you get the milk for free? instead of potentially losing half of everything he has or will acquire in life should you divorce after marrying, you've made it easy for him by not requiring he marry you first.

    i really don't understand why women don't demand marriage before having children these days. had you forced the marriage issue before having his children, you would have known the kind of man you were involved with before bringing children into the mix, and maybe have made a wiser choice.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:45 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • You need to decide how important marriage is to you. Is this something that you CAN live without or is this something that you feel you need in your life? Once you have decided how you personally feel about marriage, then you can move on. You know that he does not want marriage and you are never going to change his mind. If you two do get married, you can rest assured there will be a divorce and there might be some cheating. You also know that he did not have the respect to tell you this until AFTER you planned the wedding. You could give him some time and then move on. People do grow and change, or you can stay with him as things are. Remember, after so many years, you will become his common-law-wife. They do get some privileges. Or you can move on now. No matter what you have to make the choice. Good luck.

    krissyvelazquez

    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 8:03 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • Some people just don't want to get married. Are you otherwise happy? If so, then why worry about it since you're already living together with children.
    More often than not when a couple lives together before marriage their chances are cut in half of the relationship surving and it was only 50 % to start with so you're down to a 25% chance of it working.
    I don't blame you for wanting to get married. I would too but it's a personal choice and some people are so against marriage that it ruins a lot of otherwise great relationships.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 8:47 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN