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Had Invitro but don't know what to do with the rest of the embroys , help!!

I already have 4 beautiful kids. I have 5 embroys but I dont want to kill them. Would like to give them to a family without kids. But I would like to know them aswell. Very hard situation!! Help!!!

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Nov. 12, 2009 in Adoption

Answers (16)
  • I didn't know that was an option. I would think you would have to have found a couple before now, since the embryos will only be viable for a very short period of time.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 8:56 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • the proper MEDICAL term is "embryo" after that the proper medical term is "fetus". Just because someone uses the proper medical term doesn't mean they're playing God!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:35 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • It's good that you want to know them. People who are born from egg, sperm, and embryo donations have an even harder time finding their roots than regular adoptees. And, they are more at risk for having an inappropriate relationship with their siblings. Unfortunately I have no idea how you would go about making that a legal stipulation. Even open adoption is not legally enforceable. Ever considered a family of 9?


    Answer by onethentwins at 9:41 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • my cousin wants a baby so bad but her dh can't get her preggo....idk if she's ever considered getting donated embryos but i know they can't afford invitro

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 9:47 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • If you decide you definitely want to go this route, there are several organizations that will help match you to a couple who would carry the pregnancy and raise the babies. You can stipulate that you want to remain in contact. Like regular adoption, you have to hope you have someone who values keeping their word. As OTT pointed out, these agreements are not legally enforceable. There was a question about this recently in this forum. You can search under "embryo", and there are some resources listed. I think there is also a group here on Cafe Mom. You have a hard decision. Good luck!

    Answer by Iamgr8teful at 9:58 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • There are several organizations who specialize in embryo adoption - I know of one site simply because I know someone using the site to seek embryos - the site is called Miracles Waiting, I believe.

    Good luck to you!!

    Answer by AAAMama at 10:52 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • Have you looked at any of the websites I posted here & gathered some information? That is what i would do & where I would start. Ignore the petty bitches on here.(Cafe mom seems to have more than their fair share on here I have found) Everyone is a critic in one way or another it seems, yet NONE are an expert. It's easy to act superior from behind a computer screen. Intolerance at its FINEST!!!! The ones who ration out the most tongue lashing are usually the LEAST tolerant while condemning others for not having the same beliefs as them...


    Answer by etropic1 at 4:09 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • OP-Miracles Waiting is one site I know about and etropic1 has given you some more. I believe that there are some groups on CM that support embryo donation/adoption as well. There isn't as much written about this type of adoption vs. "traditional" adoption, and I'd strongly encourage you to study all you can about the pros/cons of this before you do it. Congratulations and good luck to you!

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 9:35 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • Embryos Alive is a great place to start. There is also an embryo adoption group here on CafeMom and I know that there are some moms waiting to be matched. Good luck!

    Answer by hollyanne31 at 9:56 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • Bethany Christian Services has a program Also. They do have a process that is similar to a traditional adoption. You would look at profiles, pick the couple and the level of future contact. The couple would have to have all of their home studies completed, etc.

    The sucess rate of frozen embryos varies dramatically so of 5 embryos, their probably is not a high chance of all 5 developing so you would likely only give them to one family.

    I think it is better than destroying them so I give you credit.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

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