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Low (scratch that) ZERO sex drive! Help!!! My poor husband!

second pregnancy, absolutely zero sex drive. It's not anything in particular, nothing my husband's done that has turned me off or anything. I just CANNOT seem to find myself in the mood. EVER. God love my ever patient man. We have had sex, but sometimes it hurts because of the way the baby is laying, (I'm only into my 4th month so baby's not THAT big yet). Did anyone else go through this? When I was prego last time, no issues, we had sex a lot, and I wanted it alot. What is going on??? Help! Cause I want sex too! I love sex with my husband. I know that it's because of the pregnancy, and I know of things I can do to get in the mood. I'm just curious if it was or is this hard for anyone else. I feel so alone! Literally.

Answer Question
 
Adeline1210

Asked by Adeline1210 at 10:07 PM on Nov. 12, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 6 (107 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Girl my first.. We we're like RABBITS! This pregnacy.. The thought of sex make's me want to vomit (dont tell my DH lol!) .. and I useually feel very sick during sex. I have NO sex drive this pregnacy. I think im going to bring it up with my doctor.
    I just fake it with DH right now. I feel so bad. I've never had to fake it before with him. I think he's realized it too. Oopps!
    Talk to your doctor.
    Good luck..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:12 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • Try not to think about it to much, that can definatley ruin it. Have a bath relax yourself, make sure you have lots of foreplay, don't just rush right into sex.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:14 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • thank you anon #1, was your first a boy?
    Adeline1210

    Answer by Adeline1210 at 10:14 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I am going through the same thing right now. I have to psych myself up for a once every 7-10 day roll in the hay. I feel babd for my hubby- I hope he doesn't take it personally. I try to tell him that I love him a lot and it is pregnancy related- but I dont' think he gets it. In a few months there will be a new baby- mayge then he will be exhausted, sore and cranky for seemingly no reason and his sex drive will go down also:)
    Sorry- I iknow this isn't helpful. I am just glad to hear that I"m not the only woman who doesnt "have sex with her husband 7-10 times a week" (thats what it seems like everyone says they do on this site.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • Anon 8:35, haha. I totally agree. I asked a similar question about zero sex drive during my pregnancy and everyone just told me positions to try. Seriously, sex made me feel sick too! And I missed sex, really I did. It made me sad and almost depressed that sex was such a turn off during my pregnancy. Now I totally want it but the doctor said we should wait 6 weeks after the delivery date to be safe. Only 3 weeks to go.. We're getting a friend to watch the baby and we're renting a hotel room!!
    preggoandfat

    Answer by preggoandfat at 11:43 PM on Nov. 12, 2009

  • I had no sex drive during my second trimester. The baby would lay on my pelvic bone and I was still dealing with horrible morning sickness. What I resorted to was telling my finance to be quick and laying on my tummy with a pillow under my ribs. It helped me breath easier and it's the position at which he finishes fastest. If your already to big to lay on your tummy I don't know how to help. My sex drive came back at about 30 weeks, if your lucky yours will too.
    jrsjrb

    Answer by jrsjrb at 12:14 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • i had no sex drive either. i didnt even want my hubby to touch me, kiss me or even look at me
    a.whaley38401

    Answer by a.whaley38401 at 12:36 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • With me, my breasts are tender, my stomach is tender, and I have been sick every evening after dinner until the morning. I'm 13 weeks and also have no desire to be touched. Its very frustrating to my husband and to me. I miss it. I want it...the hormones are there but the body isn't working with it. What few times sex has happened it left a lot to be desired and was still frustrating. Anyway...long story short...I assume that its normal, Dr says its okay...that some women see no change, some want more and some...me...want less to none.
    Wshngstr1976

    Answer by Wshngstr1976 at 4:32 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • I'm in the same position. Right now its been about a month since Dh and I have had sex. I just do not want it at all. Sometimes I don't even want to make out. I don't want to be touched or groped or anything. So I bought him a toy lol. The times we have tried it does hurt and its just uncomfortable. I'm just ready for it to be over lol. He's been understanding about it. He pouts a little bit, but not usually too bad.
    jedwards2009

    Answer by jedwards2009 at 8:04 AM on Nov. 13, 2009

  • I feel so much better knowing I am not the only one. I have been feeling so guilty I have no sex drive and before I became pregnant I was all over my hubby. It stopped almost as soon as I got preggers I just didn't know at the time that I was pregnant. I've been trying to explain it to hubby but it doesn't help that all his friends are bragging about how their spouses were crazy about sex when pregnant. This is my third pregnancy and with my other two I don't remeber this problem but I did find out much sooner with this baby. If anyone has any suggestion or things they found that work please let me know. I mean I don't even want to masturbate and I'm usually in love with my nightstand friends (as I call them lol)
    nautired

    Answer by nautired at 6:50 PM on Jan. 31, 2010

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