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How to I tell my friend who's been TTC that I'm pregnant?

My best friend has been TTC since April with no luck. I've been trying since August and just found out we're pregnant this weekend. I'm afraid I'll make her sad...keeping it from her for a few weeks until we have a better idea if it sticks will make her mad (so I think). Any advice?

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:51 PM on Nov. 14, 2009 in Trying to Conceive

Answers (5)
  • I think waiting is a good idea. I would wait until the risk of miscarriage goes down at about week 14. Hopefully she will be preggo by then too.

    Answer by Nathskitten at 8:54 PM on Nov. 14, 2009

  • I think you and your hubby/SO should make the decision who and when to tell you are pregnant. Don't let your friend's life dictate to you on that.

    That being said, she will either be very happy for you (if she is a true friend), or jealous and stop calling you (if she isn't a true friend).

    When you tell her, do it in person and alone. You don't know what reaction she will have and if you are with others and she starts to cry it may embarrass her.

    Expect her to cry.

    Answer by 07upsydaisy at 8:57 PM on Nov. 14, 2009

  • While I somewhat agree with the PP, I dont think that if she is jealous and stops calling she isnt a true friend. She might just need some time to deal with it. But she will be happy for you in the long run! It took me a few years to get pregnant. While I was trying, several of my friends got pregnant. I DID shrink back for awhile until I could compose myself while talking to them about there pregnancy. So if she does disappear for awhile, dont assume she isnt a true friend.

    Answer by nsrush83 at 10:14 PM on Nov. 14, 2009

  • Better to hear it from YOU than to hear it secondhand. Just tell her. It will hurt for a little while, but eventually, she'll be happy for you.

    Answer by Fallaya at 11:03 PM on Nov. 14, 2009

  • I've been trying ttc for a while now and two of my friends have become pregnant during that time. I think if you tell her in a way that is respectful to the fact that she might be sad or feel frustrated she will be excited for you. Just acknowledge her feelings too. One of my friends actually found out, stopeed talking to me completely because she didn't know how ot tell me and I only found out when I emailed her and specifically asked how their baby making was going.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:48 AM on Nov. 15, 2009

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