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should i think something is up?

my boyfriend has this female co-worker, who i think likes him. i met her twice. she never crossed my mind until she texts him like every day. to tell him whats about to happen t work. to ask whats for dinner at work. for whatever. she brings him food to work. she asks him to go hang out w/ a male co-worker and her. she knows about me and our son. he says he doesnt see it. but i think its obvious. but am i wrong for getting upset that she always texts? i mean, i dont mind if they talk, but it doesnt have to be constant. they can talk at work. worry about work once your there. he mentions her name a lot. but i jus figured its cuz he works w her a lot. like if i hang out w/ my friends a lot iam going to mention them.
i asked him if he likes her, he said no. he says shes a player. has lots of boyfriends and hes not interested in that. but he did say she was pretty. should i think there is something up?


Asked by krisew90 at 11:06 AM on Nov. 16, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (10)
  • INTERESTING answers. I asked if I should be upset about my husband texting a former co-worker about our children's problems with out my knowing (and from the way they talked, they talk often) and wow!! I was made to feel like a jealous 16 yr.old crazy girlfriend instead of a much older wife. ANYWAY...ABOUT YOU. Yes, it would bother me. My husband gets text's from female co-workers too, but AT work and ABOUT work. Not about what's for dinner? And it seems that your not bothered by other female co-workers, so If a red flag is going attention to it. BUT, don't let your thoughts go wild. Stay calm, and watch and listen. If there's something going on or about to go, it will show itself. Also, tell him calmly and lovingly how much this brothers you. Maybe he doesn't realize it's got a hold of you? Hope this helps. :-)


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:44 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • I wouldnt feel comfortable with my DH always texting and talking about another woman like that. My DH works with all girls and I don't mind at all. They all sit and gossip and talk and are so sweet to my DH but I wouldn't like it if he was constantly texting one of them. I would tell him that I don't mind if they're friends, but what's with her making him food for work? And always texting about stupid things? WEIRD! I'd explain to him that it makes you uncomfortable, and that you don't mind them being friends, but the constant texting and her making him lunch is a little too effed up.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:12 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • He may not be doing anything yet but that kind of behavior needs to stop before something does happen. If she wants your mn she could care less if he has someone or not. Plus why is she making him lunch? Don't let it continue. and she has no reason to be texting him when he's home. I remember my dh's old supervisor calling him alot. she liked him. they ended up kissing. as far as i know. She was a married "christian". Little tramp.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:13 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • It may be nothing now but why leave oppurtunity for something to happen later.

    Answer by persuasion91297 at 11:16 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • being friendly at work is a must. but I can think of no real reason for her to be texting him. sorry, but that wouldn't fly around here.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • thank-you. as far as ananomys at 11:13, your ignorant. dont try to mess up my day cuz yours aint going right. i kno my man loves me, would change anything i didnt like, i was just curious about this co-worker.

    Answer by krisew90 at 11:20 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • I honestly don't see a problem. What do I know I have only been happily married for 22 years. My husband and I both have friends of the opposite sex. There have been women who wanted more from him he turned them down I have turned male friends down too. It happens we have trust and faith in each other. I just cannot understand jealous people.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • Why did you call anon 11:13 out like that OP? I think she was just giving you some advice, and telling you about a personal experience she had similar to yours. Not trying to ruin your day. You'd have to be on the defensive side to perceive her message as being anything like that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:33 PM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • I know I wouldn't feel comfortable if that were my husband doing that. Whether at the giving or reciving end of that situation, it would make me uncomfortable. To me it sounds like they're close, but I couldn't tell you whether there's something going on or not.. I don't know either of them, or the details of their friendship. It does sound like they are close though. It would bother me that he was soo indirect in answering your question in whether he liked her. Saying "She's a player" isn't a "Yes" or "No" to that. That would bother me that he didn't come right out and say "Yes" or "No". I think you should just watch the situation and see if anything progresses from it. Don't hound him about it though, just keep an eye on it. If you keep pushing the subject you'll most likely push him away.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 1:09 PM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • There was another 11:13 that got deleted because she sent me a personal attack saying she was messing with my boyfriend. as far as all your answers go, i appreciate so much because they are all so helpful. its nice to kno you have someone to talk to when you need it and have no one else.

    Answer by krisew90 at 7:50 PM on Nov. 16, 2009