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When do you wait to tell a child about Santa/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy?

I was thinking about this the other day while we were watching King of Queens. They made a comment and said, "oh yeah, and Santa's really real". My almost 10yo turned and looked at me and said, "WHAT? Santa isn't real?" I just said you can't always believe what is on TV. But now he has been bringing it up.

Problem is, is that he is high functioning autistic (normal school, just special classes), and he will go crazy if he found out. Plus he has 3 younger brothers that he would tell because he doesn't understand how to keep a secret, and he would do it, to make them cry like him.

I know he is at the age he should know, but I'm not sure how to do it without him making a scene. Plus when when told him that Transformers was really a movie and there were no "car aliens" here, he had such a fit at school, he was forced to be out of school for 4 days because of his disruption. Hubby is no help!


Asked by 54313MomOf4Boys at 11:14 PM on Nov. 16, 2009 in Holidays

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Answers (6)
  • Cont...OP. I think you should talk to the special needs teachers at your school. I am sure they would have some helpful tips and it might help a great deal if you have their support on the other end. They will also probably appreciate the heads up. If they dont give you enough help you might really think of seeking out a counselor or something like that. Someone who can help him with the transition. Good luck, and I see nothing wrong with allowing your children the magic of Christmas. Millions of kids believe and are just fine when they learn the truth and How selfish are you pp that you need your kids to know the "good gifts" are from you. Way to teach its about giving.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 AM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • I tell my kids the truth from the start. ...

    Answer by outstandingLove at 11:19 PM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • my x and I were going to do that when the boys were first born....we didn't like that santa gave all the "good" presents, etc.....but our parents made us feel so guilty of not letting them "enjoy" the magic of being a child and believing that we went along with it.....grrrr...made I should make them tell the kids! They can be the bad ones then!

    Answer by 54313MomOf4Boys at 11:21 PM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • santa and others are real in our heart. in that way they are very real

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:30 PM on Nov. 16, 2009

  • My older son has told me that he still wants to believe. ...I tell them the truth, but DS1 wants to believe. so ....he will get a few presents under the tree from Santa this year.

    But really, i try to teach them more about what Santa really means. he's more then just some strange fat guy in a red suit who breaks into people's houses to give them presents. He's about the spirit of giving. I would much rather my children learn that joy and happiness can come FROM them and as well as to them.

    My MIL tried to talk me out of it. She loves Santa. ...After presenting my side of the story many times i finally told her it was no longer open for discussion.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 12:00 AM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • While its really sweet of all of you to basically tell her she was wrong to tell her children what millions of parents tell their children not one of you helped her, but good for yo for making yourselves feel better in your high and mightiness. (cont)


    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 AM on Nov. 17, 2009