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Getting custody of my stepson.

My stepson is 8. His mother is a complete and total wreck and doesn't need a child. We pay her over 600 a month and she lives with her mom and dad. He comes to our house all the time with bruises on his arms in the shape of fingerprints .. Which i have pictures of.. She mentally abuses him. Calls him stupid and cuss words like asshole and bastard. Now, he wont' play with other kids, will no longer even make eye contact. He cries at the drop of a hat and his grades are slipping. He went from a straight A student to making all D's and F's. We thought it might get better but it hasn't and we have decided to go for custody. My question is. How hard is it to get custody when the parent isn't like.. on drugs or getting DUI's? Her mother, who probably wouldn't testify.. has even told us that she is the one raising my stepson, not his mother. I'm so scared for him...

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:38 PM on Nov. 17, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • There is actually a group on cafemoms that is called Custodial StepMoms, it is a great group, give it a try!

    There is a HUGE difference between a stepmom that sees their stepchild a few times a month, and one that has to raise her stepchild (be the full time mother figure). Come join us!
    54313MomOf4Boys

    Answer by 54313MomOf4Boys at 2:40 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • Be sure to tell all of that to your lawyer, everything you can think of that she is doing wrong, or anything that you think is causing him harm where he is. Try to get him to tell these things to the lawyer or even the judge if necessary. Get him out of there as soon as you can. Maybe try calling social services and talking to them, if you can get them on your side you will have a much better chance.
    I wish you all the luck in the world.
    BlainesMommy09

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 2:42 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • There are also other groups here on CM that can give you their experiences on fighting for custody. I'm in 2 of them and they really help.

    Get a lawyer!!! Document EVERYTHING right it all down. from the bruises, to his behavior, luckily he's old enough to truly tell you what is going on. Most importantly, get a lawyer!
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 2:43 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • Mom won't like giving up that money but a good lawyer will get him for you. Call Cps and get them involved. That will help as well.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:44 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • For his sake, contact CPS immediately. A custody case could drag on for a loooong time if it approached simply as a custody case. CPS can help get him out of danger. If you can get him in counseling when he is in your care, do so. A professional can not only help him properly but is required to report abuse.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 4:15 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • I'm not much help for you, but I wanted to say I wish you luck and many blessings in getting him the help he needs and into your home full time! Hopefully he will be willing to speak out against her and testify that he'd rather live with you and his father. At that age, a judge will listen to what he has to say.
    ErinHill226

    Answer by ErinHill226 at 5:29 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

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