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How would you handle another parents actions?

Ok here it goes.. I happen to see a father or a father figure tonight who was disciplining his daughter or a female child by kicking her in the butt and yelling at her for not listening to her mother who by the way I seen was walking into the house with another one of her kids and the mother turns around and sets the baby down and as she was coming back out the door the oldest daughter was running up grabbing herself on the thigh and yelling mom he just kicked me.. I have happen to know this woman for quite sometime and I know that this isn't the first time she's jumped on his case for the way he treats her kids.. I don't know if she's scarred of what he might do if she kicks his butt to the curb or whether or not the mother just is afraid that if she does do something will he do something to her and the all the kids too? I wish I knew how I could help her?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:58 PM on Nov. 17, 2009 in About CafeMom

Answers (4)
  • Wow, that's a tough one. I would feel obligated to let someone know what's going on. It is hard to know how to help. How well do you know her - do you see her when he isn't around? Perhaps you could carefully inquire as to whether or not she needs help - you may offend her and lose her as a friend (if she is one) but at least you would know that you did what you felt you needed to in order to help someone stay safe. Try calling a local w omen's shelter and ask for their advice. Perhaps they can steer you in a direction you feel comfortable with. Good Luck.
    momofthreekjs

    Answer by momofthreekjs at 11:22 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • Maybe you could have a heart to heart with her? Especially if you are close, maybe let her know you have seen some inappropriate things, but make sure she knows you aren't trying to step on HER toes. Maybe he treats her the same behind closed doors. I would let her know if she needs ANYTHING to let you know. . let her know she has at least one support group.
    MamaHardy2008

    Answer by MamaHardy2008 at 11:23 PM on Nov. 17, 2009

  • i would ask her...maybe its nothing really serious and its their way they do things but then again maybe it is and maybe you could ask and help give her advice
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 12:12 AM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • I really wish I knew what to do. I know this woman as my neighbor and that's pretty much it. I don't see her or her kids outside much and if they are outside I know she's watching them like a hawk. So I don't know if it's one of those things that when he isn't around she's emotionally much better or it's one of those things where she's put a nutshell over so no one can see what is happening behind closed doors. I know I've heard them a few time in shouting matches and I know last night he yelled at her after she got on his case for kicking her oldest daughter and he from what I could hear sounded like he said the daughter deserved it because she is mouthy and disrespectful. I'm thinking well if you disrespectful to their mother then the kids are going to pick up on that and if he treats her and the kids bad like this all the time then it's bad for everyone in the household. I am just torn between this surge of s.t. isn't right
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 AM on Nov. 18, 2009

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