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ahh he wants to do EVERYTHING on his own!

i respect the fact that toddlers should do things on their own. but this has gotten out of hand. my son wants to do EVERY SINGLE THING on his own. if i turn a light on he says "no turn it off, me turn it on" if i turn the water for the bath on "no turn it off, me turn it on"...this is getting on my last nerve! how do i stop this? or at least slow it down a bit?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:35 AM on Nov. 18, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (7)
  • well do you run the show or not?? while the game of independence expression is cute for a while, there is a limit. either distract him or simply say NO MORE. be the parent you're supposed to be.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:51 AM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • My son just turned 4yrs. old and he loves to do all kinds of things. To be honest it's great that he is doing things for himself. Independant childern are never bored. Just wait until he makes his own milk and water in a glass and this is what I'm going through. If I put things up high he will slide a chair over to help his little self out. This is the age where they have figured things out and or they will try. My son can work a computer better than me. He loves for his dad to run is bubble bath at night , but he wants to cut the water off by himself. Now when he starts driving a car at this age than we will have a problem.. LOL... My grand mother let my son sit in her lap to crank up her car now he thinks he can do this. Not!. LOL.. They are just learning and they are very proud of them self's. If we head out i will ask my son to cut off the TV and grab his drink and he does. Good Luck! Enjoy this age.... Your lucky...

    Answer by goldielock37 at 6:28 AM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • I would give him as many oportunities to do things independantly as you can. Yes, things will take longer & yes, they won't be done as well. Depending on what it is, you may have to go back & do it all over again entirely. I wouldn't try to slow it down as much as I may try to make it less interfering with what ever I am doing or need to do.

    Aside from all that I don't think it is ok for him to tell you "no, turn it off, me turn it on". He may be excited to do new things but, it's not really ok for him to talk that way in my opinion. He doesn't know any better, so tell him. "No, don't TELL Mommy to turn it off, ASK me if you can turn it on" & then tell him how to ask "Mommy can I turn it on?" Try as much as you can to let him do the things he is asking to do & the rest of the time just tell him "Maybe next time". It's not realistic for him to do EVERYTHING on his own, EVERY time. So, take a deep breath, he's learning!

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 8:40 AM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • Oh yes, they love to help a little TOO much dont they?! lol
    Just take this opportunity to teach him manners and I think you will be ok. If my kids try to do something that is not appropriate I just hold their hand and say..."Let mommy be in charge." or "mama's job, not yours." Also, instead of saying no ALOT, you can redirect and say "Help mama do _____ instead."


    Answer by 3gigglemonsters at 10:27 AM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • Just like everything else they learn by us, wether it's talking, eating, playing, watching t.v., exercising ect.We have to teach them respect to, along with how we treat our friends and so on and so forth.He is testing the waters, sounds that way to me.All though they are so very cute, I know I have to remind myself that they need to listen to my words or they won't be so cute later on'.

    Answer by Stefono at 12:30 PM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • LOL, my youngest daughter is two and she does it really bad. I just let her do it I figure if she wants to try why not let her that is how children learn is by doing.

    Answer by lapcounter at 4:08 PM on Nov. 18, 2009

  • You do NOT turn it down or try and stop it!!!! Why would you want them to stop trying to do things on their own? WOW, letting them do things on their own will help build confidence and self esteem. So, it may be a little harder on you but so much the better for your child. It also isn't about who is in charge, kids still need to learn and show independence. How do you think they will learn to do the things they need so they become productive adults?

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 5:43 PM on Nov. 18, 2009

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