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*JUST MOM*

I think I've been having a hard time lately, because I'm just a mom. I've been trying to find something else, that I thought I needed. It was my decision to stay home with my kids, and I love it but lately it's been getting harder and harder. I really think that I feel like what I do is not important or appreciated. Like my husband goes out and makes the money and I just do regular mom stuff day in and day out. I keeping searching for something more, but maybe I just need to feel like what I'm doing is awsome. I used to. My family always says oh she's just happy to stay home with the kids and clean and cook. I don't know, Has anyone else ever felt like this?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:58 AM on Nov. 19, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (7)
  • Yes, I used to have a job an I was bringing in the money. Now, he is in the army and I stay at home. I cook.clean, everything I do is for my husband and my baby. But, sometimes he points out things like "how did that stain get there" and I automatically think hes attacking me. I know how you feel I raised my son I don't feel like he has helped much because of his job. I don't know what to say about feeling under appreciative. Its been months and I still feel like what I do is unimportant.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 AM on Nov. 19, 2009

  • No because I have one of the most important jobs in the world. There are days when I feel overwhelmed, but I will never be "just" a mom.

    Some women do need/want to work and there's nothing wrong with that. Maybe you're one of them.

    My husband goes out and goes to work. He brings home our money. *HE* gets upset because he's missed so much of the kids' lives....he didn't see the first step because he was at work..first word, at work...first sentence, away on business...he's never sat through one of their evaluations, been to their specialist appointments and admits he doesn't know how I do it and that he has trouble dealing with them all on his own.

    You have to be happy with your life. You have to figure out what will do that for you. But "just" a mom? No. There is no such thing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:20 AM on Nov. 19, 2009

  • A lot of women have felt this way. And it may be time to start doing something that is for you and/or makes you feel good about yourself. This doesn't mean you have to find paid employment, although if that is what would assist you best go for it. But there are many rewarding volunteer experiences in every community. There are fewer things that are more challenging and more rewarding than volunteering at the following:
    1) a hospice organization. As a patient companion or as someone who helps the office where needed. Believe me you would be a valued member of the team.
    2) A local domestic violence or rape crisis center. Either at the shelter or going to the hospital doing crisis work. You will be saving lives and families.
    3) Children's shelter. They need adults to take care of the young kids at all times of the day. These kids have been abused and neglected and need safe people.
    In all volunteer experiences they
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:24 AM on Nov. 19, 2009

  • give you training so you will know and be comfortable in all situations. When you volunteer you become an important member of the team, you are a valued member of the community, and you get to use the skills you already have.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:25 AM on Nov. 19, 2009

  • Yes! I've been home for the last 1 1/2 years. Before, that, I worked and supported the family. Now, it's really hard to stay home. I'm going insane. I try to keep my sanity by volunteering at my kids' school and leading a girl scout troop. I thought I'd like staying home, and I did for a while, but it's not for everyone.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 10:56 AM on Nov. 19, 2009

  • I'm totally with you! I love my son and husband, but I have needs too! A compliment or SOME form of appreciation every once in a while goes a LONG way.
    Sometimes I want to yell "I had a life before this. I have a degree! I am not a dipshit or your personal valet!" among other things.
    You are definitely not alone. Sometimes I think that nobody but another SAHM understands. What about a kick boxing or self defense class? I just started a self defense class this week and I can't tell you how much satisfaction I got out of kicking the crap out of that guy. LOL (He had padding.)
    JawgaMom1

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 2:41 PM on Nov. 19, 2009

  • I feel this way 24 hours a day 365 days a year; you are not alone on this; sometimes it is like other moms don't understand or don't want anything to do with you because you are a SAHM and they judge you also by the car you drive the house you live in, etc. I love my husband and boys but sometimes it is like why can't I be appreciated more for what I do around the house?!! We all have needs and if they aren't met then we feel like what's the use in trying.
    Christmaslver68

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 7:11 AM on Aug. 4, 2011

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