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How would you feel if you knew your daughter, 15, was kissing a boy in school (and you don't like this guy)?

Probably before school and after school during the bus rush, where tons of people are getting on or off the bus. (No dating till 16.) Would you make a big deal out of it?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:13 AM on Nov. 20, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (16)
  • From what I've read, making a big deal only causes them to want what we are protesting. I'd be dismayed about it. And maybe talk about self-respect and so forth.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 7:22 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • I would keep it calm and low key, but I would explain to her that what she is doing is not a wise thing. If you got this information from a third party, you don't have to even let her know that you are talking about her. Tell her there are two kinds of women. There are those who respect themselves enough to keep a high standard of conduct and that would include kissing boys in public. The other kind of woman is the type who has no respect for herself and gives the impression that she is easy and loose. Tell her that you hope she will be the type who respects herself because she is of great value and should not just settle for whoever or whatever comes along. Tell her that the most valuable asset to have in herself and to look for in others is character. Then teach her what good character looks like and how it behaves. If the guy in question has some negative character traits, be sure you include those in your talk.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:22 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • Whether or not you like him, IMO, is irrelevant. HOWEVER, you should talk to her about self respect and PDA (Public Display of Affection). See where her mind and maturity is. Do NOT go off on her though. It won't help.
    LyTe684

    Answer by LyTe684 at 8:14 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • don't she know that kissing aint allowed in school?
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:28 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • I am not looking foward to dealing with this stuff myself. My dd is almost 10. Have you seen her doing it yourself? I would say that someone-someone whom she really respects told you that they saw her kissing a boy. Then explain how it sends the wrong message to ppl when you are out in public making out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • i got expelled from a school for getting caugt...seriously
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:29 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • If she isn't supposed to date until 16 I assume she isn't supposed to be making out? And this is a rule she is aware of? If so she is breaking a rule and needs to be disciplined. I would ground my dd from social activities for a few days and make it clear she cannot date or kiss til she's 16. All this crap about not telling her no bc she'll do it anyway is such passive aggressive parenting! Tell her no and if she does it anyway she gets consequences. You don't just stand by and let ur kids do what they want you stand firm and even if they hate you now they will thank you when they are 20 and mature responsible wise adults thanks to a GOOD parent.
    itsnotaclowncar

    Answer by itsnotaclowncar at 9:37 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • No I wouldn't make a big deal about it but I would remind her of what's important in a man (respecting her) , my concerns why he's not the right guy for her and that it's swine flu season and they shouldn't be kissing...ok that one was dumb but I'd tell her that kissing in public doesn't give a good message.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:38 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • Invite him to dinner. Ask him what his intentions are.
    motherofhope98

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 11:00 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

  • I would invite him over for dinner. Welcome him like a long lost son. Either you will see what she sees in him, or your daughter will realize what it is that you don't like about him.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:02 AM on Nov. 20, 2009

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