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My sis is in an abusive relationship

My little sis is in a mentally abusive relationship (i think more but i have no proof she makes excuses) and things got bad tonight. She called me the past few days bawling because he was blaming his misery on her while she works full time and waits on him hand and foot while he plays video games. I got a phone call from her saying they went to go shopping and when they got to the store he degraded her for a long time and threatened suicide and said well forget lets just shop. Once they got into the store he dissapeared and she thought he left her ther fine she called me to pick her up and he started acting crazy and chasing her in the store saying he didnt care where he was and that he would put her through the wall. She had to get security . (Last time he acted like this she had no windows in her car and got hurt) Anyway My hubby takes her to the house to get her stuff to stay here and she went back to him WTF

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michellej135

Asked by michellej135 at 12:50 AM on Nov. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • you can't make her decisions for her... just be there for her when she needs you....like you were.


    Takes more then once of leaving usually for someone to leave an abusive relationship.


    I think it took me about four.

    Good luck
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 12:54 AM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • It takes alot to leave an abusive relationship. There's alot hanging over your head. Your life, your abusers life, your dreams, your desires. Abusers tend to be people you trust fully and completely when you first start dating. They have a way of sucking out everything important to you. When it starts out you feel that there is no one in the world you trust more. You tell them everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. Then over time they slowly use those things against you. They trap you with the things most important to you. By the time you realize you need out you're so convinced that you're abuseer really can take those things from you leaving seems worse then staying. Leaving means losing everything. Leaving usually means someone will die. It takes time and several failed attempts to leave before you realize that it's all lies. That's what it was for me, and every other abused women I've ever spoken to.
    jrsjrb

    Answer by jrsjrb at 1:27 AM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • Abused women go back all the time. They feel guilty. They feel lonely. They feel responsible. If you like to read there is a book called The Emotionally Abused Woman that is pretty good but she won't leave until she's ready....or dead. Tell her you would like for her to be ready and not wait for dead. It will only get worse in time if she stays. The abuse tends to get worse at holiday time. He obviously has some serious issues. I'd leave and refuse to go back until he gets help. (I actually did so am not giving advice I didn't do myself)
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:55 AM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • Thank you everyone for helping me understand the relationship more and I will be there for my little sis everystep of the way
    michellej135

    Answer by michellej135 at 1:14 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

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