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More money or more children?

What's your preference? Would you rather have less children and be able to do more for them, such as more gifts for birthdays/Christmas, more sports and activities, being able to pay for college, weddings, etc. and having more financial resources available to care for your children?

Or would you prefer to have more children, even if it means scrimping and saving for the things you need and not having the resources you would have with a smaller family?

 
tyheamma

Asked by tyheamma at 12:22 PM on Nov. 21, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 19 (7,438 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • More kids, less 'things.' We have three kids. It feels like a big family to me (I'm an only child.) I'm a SAHM- my dh and I both agreed that being around for the kids when they were young was the best thing. I do work part time/casual on weekends. We are not hurting for money- we make our mortgage payments, our car payments, and we put clothes on the kids backs and food on the table. Luxury items like vacations we do need to budget for- we just went to Disneyworld last fall. It was our first big family vacation and it was worth the wait! I would rather have the three kids we have and fewer perks like fancy clothes or a bigger house. My parents could always provide 'things' but never provided a lot of closeness. I would rather provide a slightly larger family and have the kids realize that sometimes 'things' do not come easy and need to be worked for over time.
    Freela

    Answer by Freela at 4:05 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • More money. I'm done at 2 :)
    SandraB383

    Answer by SandraB383 at 1:11 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • It isn't our children who are making us tight on money, it's our mortgage. Haha
    But honestly I am sticking at two so that we have more money to do more things with/for them. I always thought I wanted 7 children, but when I became pregnant it dawned on me that I really wouldn't want that. Not that I don't love a big family, it's just we would never be able to afford all we want to do as a family with seven kids. We have two and knew from the start that, that would be the perfect amount to do all we wanted to. It allows us room to have family vacations and provide those extra special things for them, which is what we wanted when we had kids.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 4:29 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • More money... I also stopped at 2 for that reason, but those that choose differently-no worries as long as they can provide a decent life independently... its all good! BTW- attention also played a key role- WE felt we could not provide the attention to more than 2 in the way WE wanted to. Again, if you feel differently and its working- yeah for you!!!
    wildboyz1994

    Answer by wildboyz1994 at 4:52 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • I don't plan on paying for their colleges or wedding. They will each be given X amount for it & then be expected to cover the rest.
    mommybug77

    Answer by mommybug77 at 5:33 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • I would never give up a child for more money. We have three-we can afford our three. We may not have brand new cars (both are less than 6 years), a huge fancy house or extra money to blow through but we can afford what we have, kids have college funds, we take a trip a year and kids do extras and we're happy with what we have. I could give two $h!ts to keeping up with the Joneses.
    pagirl71

    Answer by pagirl71 at 5:17 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • rolling on floorYou seriously have to ask this?  If you can't afford kids, you should not be creating kids.   Everyone NEEDS to earn money now.   That means, we should not be creating children that we cannot afford.   If you bring a child into this world, you need to be able to afford all of his needs, including a college education.    People really need to start wisening up.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:33 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • Dear Anon:33,

    No, what we NEED to be doing is rethinking our priorities! We DO NOT NEED a new car every 2 yrs, humongous homes and 5 acre housing lots that we aren't even going to use. We DO NOT NEED designer clothes & shoes. We DO NOT NEED the latest & greatest electronic gadgets & toys.

    We DO NEED support, love & family. When we are old & gray, are we going to be reminiscing about that great big TV we bought when the baby was 2 or are we going to be reminiscing about how our 2 y/o preferred the box the toy car came in to the toy car? Are we going to be thinking about how much joy our cars brought to us or how much joy our children brought?

    Our families sustain us througout our lives; right to the very end. Can we say that for things? I would rather live my life with a little tight around the edges financially than deny myself the neverending & bountiful riches that a family can bring.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:00 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • We can afford to have 6 kids we chose to only have one. We love our son and felt very content as a family after his birth. I think people should have as many children as they want providing they can afford to care for them properly and most importantly give them the love and support they need. We didn't choose money over kids we only wanted one. My son is 15 years old and a great son. He is healthy, happy and well loved.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:36 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

  • OP here.

    Anon 9:33, I paid for my own college education, and I was happy to do it. I never assumed it was my parents responsibility to pay for my adult needs, and I won't feel guilty if I can't do it for my children.

    Personally, I would prefer to have more children and make the money stretch. My children don't need everything to be brand new. They don't need to be involved in three different expensive activities each. They need a family who loves and cares for them, and for us, it means more children rather than more money. Not everyone feels this way, and that's fine... but nobody is bad or negligent for choosing one or the other.
    tyheamma

    Answer by tyheamma at 2:42 PM on Nov. 21, 2009

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