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Secrets from the family?

Ok, this is kinda an odd question but I don't know where else to put it. We all keep secrets from our family (like our mom, dad, grandparents, aunts, etc.). And some of them the family may not approve of (secretly homosexual or something). Now here's my question, I know sometimes people say I can't tell so and so this because it will kill them. Can you actually kill someone (like cause a heart attack) just by telling them really REALLY shocking or against their standards?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:27 AM on Nov. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I don't think you could, I personally have never heard of this happening anywhere other than in movies.
    BlainesMommy09

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 11:29 AM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • I think you risk killing the relationship you have/had with the person who asked you not to tell would be the more likely outcome!
    AddyLeigh

    Answer by AddyLeigh at 11:46 AM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • That's a figure of speech 99.99% of the time. I'm sure there's been cases where the person had a really bad heart condition and any excitement at all would trigger one, then yea I'd be careful to not upset them.
    BUT telling something shocking could cause a terrible chain reaction of events. Ex: Was on the news the other day about a kid (15) that told his Mom that he'd had inappropriate relations with a toddler and the Mom calls the Dad and tells him... Dad comes home with a gun and shoots his own son... no offer to help him, no rehabilitation, no nothing, just kept shooting him till he was dead. Terrible chain of events so I'm guessing a controlled enviroment would be a good idea if it's something that is horribly shocking that could cause them to go insane for even a moment of time.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 12:09 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • lisa - it isn't that bad. I am just worried about telling my grandmother something. Her health isn't good (just went into remission, she had lymphoma cancer) and is stressed out about my little cousin because he is acting like a typical 18 year old, my 1 brother because his wife is mistreating him, and 2 of my older cousins because they are pregnant. So I am just scared this might push her over the edge. I know it will greatly disappoint and upset her. But I also know I need to tell the family at some point. I guess I am debating trying to wait it out till she dies or not to tell family.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • Is it YOUR secret or someone else that has asked you not to say anything? That would make a difference in my answer, lol.
    AddyLeigh

    Answer by AddyLeigh at 12:29 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • Addy - It is my secret. It is something about myself that I have hid my entire life. The only time I tried to talk to my mother about it she told me I would get over it soon enough and that was the end of it. Then again, my mother was a bad mother overall. I never said anything to my grandmother because I knew it will at least kill her a little bit on the inside.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:34 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • I don't know. My step sister said something to our "Dad" at a wedding one night as he was leaving (they don't speak and haven't in 15 years) and the very next day he had a heart attack.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • Well, then I suppose it would depend on how necessary you truly think telling grandma would be! If it is the homosexual ex. you used above, and you think that would destroy her and she's already in bad health, maybe just spare her and keep it on the DL until she passes, I mean, you've already waited THIS long. If not, just weigh it out and decide if it REALLY is something grandma needs to know. Will you feel worse when she's gone if you told her something that you say will crush her, or if you don't tell her?
    AddyLeigh

    Answer by AddyLeigh at 1:02 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • Addy it isn't the homosexual example. I just couldn't think of any other example. My issue is gender identity issues and I have always been her pretty little girl (I lived with her for like 5 years or so).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • You cannot cause someone a heart attack unless they have pre-existing symptoms. Nobody can spontaneously have a heart attack, stroke, or die of something without pre-existing symptoms. Even if there is no visable signs, there is always something internally that will eventually cause said reaction. However, telling someone shocking or unsettling news cannot cause these things. Not without a pre-existing condition.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 8:13 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

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