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What's a good age to start your teen girl on BirthControl?

I'm conflicted because I don't think she's having sex, but I don't know for sure. On one side I feel like she'll leave out of the GYN's office feeling like she has my permission to have sex now. On the other hand, I feel like if she's sneaking and doing it already, I'd be a fool not to protect her. Of course I've asked and of course she's said No Way. But I told my mom No Way @ 15 when I was sneaking and had her @ 16 and if history repeats itself b/c I'm being stubborn or naive, I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I don't want to encourage it, but I don't want to ignore the fact that it may be a possibility either. Any advice mom's?


Asked by Dmommy4 at 3:49 PM on Nov. 22, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Level 9 (315 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Talk to your daughter! Let her tell you what she needs.

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:13 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • around 13 or 14. I had serious cramps with my period and once I started taking birth control (way after I started having sex) I wished I had known about it sooner.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:52 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • Instead of worrying that you are giving her permission to have sex by putting her on BC, why not give her "permission" to have self-control & self-respect & skip the BC. Why not teach your children that sex outside of a loving, committed marriage isn't appropriate & that not all teens are doing it. Focus on the fact that her purity is the greatest gift she will be able to give to her husband & that it's worth protecting & saving for marriage. Our teens are far more capable of focusing on things other than drugs, sex & the like, yet society doesn't give them credit for being worthy of more. They are not hormone driven sex fiends as society would have them believe, but when it's constantly pounded into their heads that they aren't capable of abstaining & they are just slaves to their hormones, & that it's a right of passage, it's no wonder so many have no self-respect and no self-esteem...


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:17 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • I think BC is not effective enough. I do agree with you on one thing if she gets it she thinks she is protected when she isn't. BC will help prevent pregnancy but does nothing for STDs. I too was a teen mom, and because of that I started talking to my DD very early and with each conversation I went into more detail more info. I always told her that it was her decision and only hers to make if and when she choose to have sex but that BC would not protect against STD's and that having a baby is not the worst that could happen and to me that would be AIDS. Condoms and BC is a very good combo.
    If you want to get her on BC go right ahead and do it but please remind her that it does nothing for the other diseases. Show her images of sexually transmitted diseases and what they do. Kids that age think it won't happen to me, and that is a huge mistake. Images help enforce what you have taught her.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 4:20 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • The pill is not the only form of birth control. I'm surprised people on CM all seem to call the pill "birth control".

    Kids need to know about lots of forms of birth control at a young age, before 10. I was a health educator and it seemed my kids always knew. They should know condoms and foam are at drug stores and together they are more than 99% effective. That may be more effective than a teen girl taking (and forgetting) the pill. They also knew about how stupid the withdrawl method (pull out) is and how you can mess up with condoms.

    Kids need to know how to find info on computers by doing a google search, how to evaluate info they find, and how to make decisions. We homeschooled so this was something we did every day. I don't know if all kids are learning this in all schools. It is something everyone should know how to do.

    Kids can then learn on their own about birth control.

    Answer by Gailll at 5:05 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • "Why not teach your children that sex outside of a loving, committed marriage isn't appropriate & that not all teens are doing it. "

    Yeah, cause that'll work...

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:06 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • If you really don't feel comfortable with putting her on BC just for the scared she'll get knocked up factor take her period into acount. If she's even a little irregular or has bad pms or cramps all are amazing reasons to put her on BC. When I was 14 I threatend my mom that I would start having sex if she didn't put me on birth control. My periods were horribly irregular and painful. Just make sure you cover the no sex convo while you're at it.

    Answer by jrsjrb at 5:53 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • GO WITH YOUR GUT. Get her on birth control, you would be wise. You can have the "chat" about waiting and stuff but I would get her on it asap. Young girls have sex, some do it responsibly and some don't.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 6:03 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • I know this is a difficult decision but if you feel she's at risk I would do it. Some offices offer classes to teens on how to protect themselves.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:35 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • Go with your gut instinct. Better safe than sorry. I would have long talk with her though. Talk to her about how you would rather she wait and not get pregnant at an early age because it is not easy to raise a child and grow up at the same time. That kids are expensive and you will not support her and a grandchild. Talk to her about respect and responsibility. You can put her on the Depo shot and you won't have to worry about her forgetting to take a pill.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:50 PM on Nov. 22, 2009