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behavior issues

how can i get my 3 year old to listen and always seems to have a sugar high and i dont give him sugar what so ever!!!!.... he got kicked out of sunday school class and he gets in trouble allot at his daycare. i have talked to my son dr about it and the dr is no help just says hes a boy what do you expect.. but this behavior is to the point where my 3 year old tells me no and not only that to shut up! the last straw has been pulled and i dont know what to do... please help

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elias1mamma22

Asked by elias1mamma22 at 4:57 PM on Nov. 22, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Be careful about your choice of words. If think you mean you want to get your son to obey. You used the word listen. Two different words, very different meanings. When you are dealing with a 3 year old you have to pay attention to how you use words.

    If your child is in day care you probably don't spend much time with him. The time you do spend is rushed becaue you have to take care of dinner, the house, laundry, your husband, and other things. It has to be hard with a child that won't do what you tell him.

    You need to learn some new parenting skills. Love & Limits by Elisabeth Crary is a small, practical book that may change your life. She has a website called Star Parenting that has some info.

    Authoritative parenting is the most effective parenting style. You might try doing a google search if you would like to learn more.



    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 5:26 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • No Gailll, she was correct with the use of the word "listen". If he "listened" to her he would be OBEYing her. Yes they are two different words, but she is correct.

    OP...if you feel there might be a problem (developmental or neurological) then find a developmental pediatrician or give your school district's special education department a call. Their job is to make sure he can function in an education environment. If he can't handle Sunday school, obviously he's going to have trouble in preschool. They'll evaluate him in a variety of different areas and see if any kind of services might help him.

    Until then, I'd recommend behavior modification. When you put him in time out, there is no time limit. He stands there until he is willing to do as he was told. This could be 30 seconds or 30 minutes. There's more to it but not enough space here (damn cafemom and their stupid character limits)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:09 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • My ds is 3 and can get a bit mouthy at times. I think it is age and gender. With that being said, he knows when he has crossed the line. I count for him, 1 you are not supposed to (insert behavior here), 2 I have told you that you are not supposed to do and if you do it again you will go to the corner. 3 you are going to stand in the corner until the timer goes off because you did (xyz) after you were told not to. I usually set the timer for 3 mins, however, if the behavior is super bad, like hitting the dog with a toy intentionally, I will set it for longer. He is a very well behaved child and I get compliments on his behavior all the time. It is something that I am very consistent with and was with my DD as well. You HAVE to follow through all the time. It is a must! My son despises having to stand in the corner and he knows that if I get to 3 he will be standing there, wherever we are. Hang in there momma!!
    stretchswife

    Answer by stretchswife at 10:43 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • thanks for the ideas!! i might have to try the corner thing! right now i put my son in his chair and he does not like it one bit but i think the corner would work better. hes a good boy and says please and thank you and what not he just has his time allot where he does not like to listen to me or his teachers...
    elias1mamma22

    Answer by elias1mamma22 at 11:39 PM on Nov. 22, 2009

  • My DD is like this and if I do not stay on her she will back slide and get really...stubborn! The corner works great for us. ALso taking certain toys away(TV Games whatnot) I know to get her to clean the bedroom...I have special toys(wih mult peices) I keep away, she gets to play with one when she is done, she like Mr Potatoe head or the Fishing game. For bed time she love sto brush her teeth so thats the new cool thing to do!!
    IMAMOM2-2KIDS

    Answer by IMAMOM2-2KIDS at 3:34 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

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