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Would you want to know...

If someone on probation for a 4th degree sexual assault would be at a holiday gathering?
Backstory: The assault was against his own sister (who was an underage teen he was like 19 or 20 at the time). He pl;ea bargained down to 4th degree, did some jail time, paid a fine and is on probation. I do belive he has a no contact order, and his own 4yr old daughter is not allowed to live in the house with him (but for some reason the 2yr old boy is still in the house).
I found out on my own, the person who is hosting the holiday knows- but downplays it and has not told anyone. Would you want to know about this? Do you think that everyone who would be attending the holiday gathering has the right to know about this?
Thank you for your opinions and views on this subject.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:59 AM on Nov. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Anyone who will be bringing children to the party has a right to know and the hosted is obligated IMO to make sure they are aware. Otherwise, if he assaults a child at her hopuse and she knew his histpory that makes her complicit.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 10:32 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • I would certainly want to know.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:12 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Any young girls at the party? I would call who ever was hosting and tell them that they need to inform adults incharge of children not to allow anyone alone with him! It sounds like you do not have all the facts, so I wouldn't make this a thing you start talking about once you arrive, anyone who is taking children there needs to be informed of the issue and if I were you I probably wouldn't attend if I felt uncomfortable about it, no need to explain why, just say sickness or something, good luck mom! PS--kind of makes you wonder how many people our kids come in contact with that we don't know about their past records!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 10:15 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Yes, there would be little girls and a young adult girl there. The person hosting (my mil) won't tell, as her granddaughter(my hubbys niece) married the piece of crap. I did hear that his visit was revolked, I am going to call the parole officer today and see if that is true, and ask about the conditions of his parole (contact/no contact). I also informed my hubby that if that person would be at any holiday/family gatherings we would NOT be there, as I will not allow my children any contact with that piece of crap.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:29 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • I'd call the parole officer and let him know about the gathering and that young girls will be there. Then....watch as the parole officer shows up, nails him for violation of his probation/parole and has him hauled away.....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:32 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • *hostess
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 10:32 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • I would tell the host(ess) that I will not be attending because......
    If anyone asks if you are going tell them no and why.
    motherofhope98

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 10:38 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • YES =----AND IF NO ONE TOLD ME AND I FOUND OUT LATER I WOULD HAVE TO BE SEDATED ---- I WOULD FLY INTO A RAGE---THAT THE HOSTESS DID NOT TELL ANYONE----I THINK SEXUAL PREDATORS SHOULD BE COLLARED, STUDIED, AND MARKED SO EVERYONE KNOWS AND STAYS AWAY
    blue_glass_mama

    Answer by blue_glass_mama at 10:59 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • i was raped and have kids i certainly would want to know.but i dont know how you should approach this.maybe keep a watchful eye on whats going on?or maybe tell who ever is hosting the party that you know.i am very not sure about this?is this person better?who knows?i know i wouldnt want them around me or my kids. but then again thats why i have a 250 pnd dh and a 100 pnd german shepherd.and a 225pnd sil....so there i am well protected.my feeling is i guess do what you think is right.i am bias .and have been thrown off a jury because of this so...i just know what i know...good luck.
    cleo1977

    Answer by cleo1977 at 11:10 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • I did call the PO and she said that his visit is revolked-- YAY!!!!!!! Evidently they (niece and piece of crap) lied to her. Another family member (someone in nieces family) had called the PO on friday and expressed concern- and that call caused her to revolk the visit.
    I also found out more about his case--- he started out as a felony sexual assault but plea bargained down to misdemenor. He does have a no contact order for girl children. The PO said that for any family holiday she would have to call everyone make sure it is ok with ALL of the parents before he is allowed to attend. I told her my answer would be HELL NO, I do NOT want him around my children.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:13 AM on Nov. 23, 2009

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