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What would you do if your child was a bully?

I don't think my kid could be a bully she's so sweet right now but she is only 2. But if she ended up being a bully I would have to get strict with her and take away all her privilages til she softens up.

Do you fear of your child being a bully? What would you do if they were?

Answer Question
 
Imogine

Asked by Imogine at 5:52 PM on Nov. 23, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 22 (14,425 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I have an almost 7 year old ss, a five year old son and 15 month old baby boy. All boys, one of them is bound to be a bully to the other at some point (which we have already crossed) My step son is allowed to rough play and tease and be generally mean to his other brother in his mom's house. We do not tolerate that in our house. If you never allow it, I am not saying that it won't happen, but if they get a firm grasp on if they would like to be treated that way, they won't do it to others (I don't think). And when they do, I would remove her from the situation, make her apologize (depending on the age) get a small gift for the other person and not allow her to do fun things for a few days. Part of growing up, is learning empathy and sympathy and it comes with age.
    MamaRoberts

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 5:59 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Oh yes. The reason it worries me is she is already "picking and choosing" which girl will be her "best" friend for the day. The teacher said they all want to be picked and then she laughed and said it was cute. I don't think I like it at all! I am going to arrange to see this myself without being noticed if I can. If it's really just cute then fine. If it's what I am afraid it is then their will be alot to change. I just have to wonder what we do to our "sweet angels" to turn them into petty tyrants. I wasn't a pickee, and I SURE wasn't a picker! Maybe the fact that you are already gearing up for the possibility will keep her from getting to that point. Good Luck Momma!
    mygirlscome1st

    Answer by mygirlscome1st at 6:12 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • I don't fear it. I have known what I was going to do long before I had a child. If my son is a bully I will take him to a therapist for some play therapy sessions and have the thrapist assist in the changes needed. From education to understanding the reasons why he feels the need to bully. At home his contact with friends will be limited and then monitored when he does have contact with friends. Activities limited and school reports daily - including related arts teachers. I plan to volunteer at his school but of course I will be more of a presence and available. Of course the education starts now with my being compassionate and fair to him. Not bulling him now is being a good role model. A lot of parents don't realize thier behavior has bully like qualities but call it "parenting." But of course a bully today is a rapist/batterer...someone who feels it is okay to sexually assault someone tomorrow.

    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 6:19 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • my son is fixin to be 5...he has always been such an angel and i could never imagine him being a bully but with his half sister i did experience this. I had a parent call me one night and tell me that she was teasing a boy in class and that he was so depressed that he wanted to change schools because she had made him lose all of his friends. I was so angry i wanted to beat her. I tried so hard to explain to her how people are different and how some people are less fortunate and just because you have less doesnt mean you are less of a person. I dont know if i got through to her..(i no longer see her..i'm not with her dad anymore) but i feel like our conversation sunk in and that even if she will be a bratty teen she will probably look back at it and regret it when she is an adult. She will remember what i said and know that i was right
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 7:27 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • i feel like there should be clubs in schools that you should get graduation credit for...."not being a bully"...the clubs should focus on bullying and talk about it. Kids get bullied at school but they also get bullied at home. They could talk about prevention and how to move forward if they have been a victem
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 7:31 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Military school!!!
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 8:59 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Kids who are bullies almost always have parents who are bullies. A parent who is a bully is going to pat their bully kid on the back. My child isn't one so I cannot say what I would do. I would probably look at what we were doing and make some changes so we patterned better for him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:08 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

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