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My 8 week old daughter! HELP

She cries all the time when not being held. today was her first day at daycare and they told me that we have to work on something bc they cant hold her all day. is there anything we can do to help her not need to be held all day, she falls asleep on me and when i put her in her swing or bed she wakes up and starts screaming. we have tried her bouncy chair, swing, play mats and she always starts crying. I dont want to let her CIO but any advice will help! thanks

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Asked by MickenziesMom at 9:18 PM on Nov. 23, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (14)
  • my mom does an in home daycare. she actully bought a Moby Wrap so she could hold a particular baby all day.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:22 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • My answer isn't going to be popular, so I'm posting anon to avoid hate mail. But, it is unnatural for a mother to not raise her own baby. Babies cry at daycare because it's not natural to be abandoned for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, by the woman that is supposed to be nurturing her.

    Unless you are a single mom, please try and find a way to stay at home with your precious baby.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:27 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • I feel bad for having to leave her but I am active duty air force so there is no possible way i can stay home with her.but even when i do have her had home i am constantly having to hold her because she wont stop crying. good thing is i only work 4 days a week and then off 2 but i still have to work. i just wish there was something i could do to help soothe her. she was never like this until we had to take her to the hospital last thursday once we got her home its been none stop so i normally just hold her all the time so she is not crying.

    Answer by MickenziesMom at 9:33 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Gonna have to agree with anon and post openly bc I don't care about hate mail. I'm not a single mother and we are making sacrifices for me to stay home. I have cried it out feeling bad about giving up on a career I have worked hard for. Anyone can replace me at work. But I can't trust anyone to replace me as a mom.

    If SO were to disappear, I'd go on PA and stay home and say so what. I have worked for years and paid into the system. I'd have no qualms about getting a a partial return on all the money I've paid in.

    Answer by ecodani at 9:37 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Aaawww! poor baby either you let her cry it out atleast for 10 minutes or she will never grow out of it she will eventually grow out of it I mean she was so used to inside your belly then in your arms and now blankets and strangers just let her adjust I am so sorry you have to go through this but if you have to go to work this is the only option unless someelse comes up with something.

    When you leave her to cry it out in her room leave the tv on or some soothing music or something colorful around her but not to where she can sufficate just 10 minutes every so often. GL It is just a phase.

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 9:48 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • try swadling her really tight with a receiving blanket you won't hurt her but some babies like the snuggy feeling my youngest was born premee and i had to swaddle her and put her in the bouncer on her stomach so everytime she moved it bounced herself. just make sure she is still straped in once she gets big enough to move around alot i don't think it would be safe. just a suggestion.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:57 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Find a provider who is familiar with normal babies who want to be held all the time. Moms with several kids do it, they can do it too. Buy/make a wrap and send it with her, I know it wasn't hard for me to wear my newborn and do other things... in your case, ALL your care provider should be doing is caring for kids (not all the house cleaning and laundry I was doing).

    If care provider won't abide, find a new one. She'll outgrow this phase (for now) and become interested in the other kids... but for now she just need to be held. It'll pass.

    Answer by LeanneC at 10:03 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • thank you your posts i will try the swaddling, we swaddle her for bed and sleeps almost all night she only wakes up once or twice but i know she tries to fight sleep during the day bc you know sometimes she is tired but then sometimes she just wants to be held. thank you again.

    Answer by MickenziesMom at 10:08 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Swaddling is going to be your best bet...but this is completely normal for the age. They're designed to be held. Babies are rather primitive; they think that if they're not being held they're going to get eaten by something.

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:21 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

  • Don't worry, things will get better. I totally understand that you can't just quit your job and be a SAHM and people who are recommending that you do that really aren't helping. At 8 weeks your baby still misses the womb so try and do things to replicate that experience.

    I tried swaddling and I also had this little teddy that mimicked the noise of the womb, my baby stopped crying when she heard that too. I would also lie down with her and talk to her so she felt better about not being held. Put some nice music on every time you put her down too. Just try putting her down for a few minutes at a time but never leave her to cry as she won't learn to trust you. As long as she knows that you'll be there for her when she's upset, then this phase will pass pretty quickly.

    As for daycare, if things don't improve try and find an individual who could give her one to one attention instead?

    Answer by TopBrit at 10:22 PM on Nov. 23, 2009

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