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I am confused on what I do should. Im 3 months pregnant my ex-boyfriend/father of the child broke up bout 2 months ago. Should I he be included in the birth of the child? I mean I know he should it would only be right. But my mom dislikes and Im feeling that if I tell him when I go into labor and he comes. It will be hell between him and my mom? What to do?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:01 AM on Nov. 24, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • My child's father was not included in the birth of my daughter,my parents disliked him and we broke up when I was 7 months. It's a hard decision, but you have to look at your baby's best interest.Whats all the reasons why you are thinking of him not being there? would he/she have a better life with out him? but ONLY YOU have that ultimate decision. It is only a once in a life time thing.This will be a hard decision I made mine when my water broke..I still wish I had more time to think about it..MSG me if you need to talk.
    MamasAngelPie

    Answer by MamasAngelPie at 9:48 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • Your mom has no say in the matter..
    AngeLnChainZ

    Answer by AngeLnChainZ at 12:02 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • He is the father of the child you should include him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:02 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • WHAT IS DONE IS DONE WITH THE RELATIONSHIP....IT IS NOT ABOUT YOU THE FATHER NOR YOUR MOTHER BUT ABOUT THE CHILD...EVEN THOU YOUR MOTHER MAY BE UPSET WITH U TELLING THE FATHER WHEN U ARE IN LABOR, DON'T TAKE THAT FROM HIM...SEEING THE BIRTH OF HIS CHILD. HE WILL NEVER GET THAT BACK. ONCE THE BABY IS BORN YOUR MOTHER WILL NOT EVEN WORRY ABOUT THE FATHER BUT HOLDING THAT GRAND BABY....
    cbcbcb3

    Answer by cbcbcb3 at 12:06 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • yeah i know...... i just want to have clear conscious i dont want to take that away from him that would be cruel. our relationship didnt work out but we created a life and he deserves a part in too. im just really afraid of my mom's reaction especially of what she will say and do. when i have my prenatal visits she doesnt want me to go alone without a family member. she doesnt even want him to know the due date. for example, she will say if he comes im not coming. she likes to call bluff my mom is a stubborn person. our relationship is over i just would want him to be part of the birth. im anxiously awaiting the arrival of my little one but not of the drama that comes along with it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:12 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • You need support! If he's not willing to be there with you while your pregnant and if he's not being part of the pregnancy and doesn't give you massages and foot rubs and help you out and ask how your doing then your mom should be first.. he does have a right to be there and you should invite him but both of them should be able to put their differences aside and help you, and if they can't then i'd choose your mom, unless he's really helping you out
    Jan0609momma

    Answer by Jan0609momma at 12:15 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • i suppose it depends on why you broke up. and if he wants to be there. your mom will get over it, and if they cause too much drama, the dr and nurses will kick them out of the room. if you feel like its going to be that big of a distraction, then talk with your mom. let her know he has the right to be there if he wants, and you want her there for her support. she should understand.
    mrsjosey1018200

    Answer by mrsjosey1018200 at 12:25 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • I HAD THE SAME SITUATION HE CAME FOR THE DELIVERY ANDC RIED ALOT GUILT I SUPPOSE .I DONT REGRET IT HE IS A NICE GUY BU T JUST DOESNT KNOW WHAT HE IS MISSING NOW.mY SON IS 11 HES BEEN GONE SINCE HE WAS 2.JUST DONT EXPECT ANYTHING AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
    lilobrat

    Answer by lilobrat at 1:40 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Your ex has a right to be there. I would tell my Mom in no uncertain terms that if SHE acts up in the delivery room she will be the one missing the birth and that you would hate that because you need her so much. That way she knows that you don't want her to miss out, and that you need her there to hold your hand, but that behaving herself is important too. That way, you are laying the groundwork for a future with your baby. If you don't have the strength and maturity to stand up to your mother now, maybe you should consider giving your baby up for adoption. Sorry, I know that's harsh, not what you need when you're pregnant and hormonal, but now is the time when you are forced to be mature.
    JawgaMom1

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 9:58 AM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • In my opinion neither of them have any "rights" during the birth of your child. This is going to be the most intimate moment you ever experience and you should do whatever you're comfortable with. I didn't have my son's dad there, I had someone call him and inform him after he was born. He left me while I was pregnant and I knew I would not be comfortable with him standing around me during that. Even if you were married it's not his right it's a privilege. This is your moment and do whatever you feel best with. Good Luck
    michelle2414

    Answer by michelle2414 at 12:40 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

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