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why the hate??


Asked by Anonymous at 12:14 PM on Nov. 24, 2009 in Money & Work

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Answers (15)
  • The first anon answer is the whole problem. She likely will say she works because she doesn't have a choice and the reality is probably she doesn't want to have to raise her own children. I don't know one SAHM who is happy all the time staying home. It's extremely demanding, there is little to no reward save seeing how one's children are learning and growing and knowing for sure they are okay and not languishing in a daycare bed or floor crying with the "provider" standing around not paying attention. And say goodbye to any private time for yourself because even husbands can be like everyone else and call us lazy or say we don't deserve a break. But to work before our children are in school, for the vast majority of us, means $800 to $1000 or more a month in childcare. IMO, that is an incredibly stupid waste of money. But I've reached the point where FTWM can complain all they want. It's jealousy and lazyiness anyway.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:52 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • There's no "vs". All moms who love and care for their children are good moms.

    Answer by kenzie07 at 12:19 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • I was a SAHM, but I got bored. I'm good at what I do and I wasn't comfortable knowing what was "right" for my son all day long. I made a choice to work full time, because it fulfilled me, whereas staying home (as a single mom by the time he was 2) did not make me feel "whole".
    So, if I hate anyone, I guess I have to hate myself.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • a good sahm is on the clock 24/7. They are Lazy women on both sides.

    Answer by gammie at 12:20 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • What hate? I have done both. I really don't care what other mothers choose to do. Hubby and I decided it would be best for me to be with the children.

    I'm far from lazy, I don't complain or air my personal business on this site. First poster, don't lump all SAHM's as lazy.


    Answer by Christine0813 at 12:20 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • ive done both, I worked 2 jobs and was still a good mom, now im a stay at home mom. Ill admit sometimes it is boring but it takes some getting used to just like everything else. I dont have any hate what so ever for the FTWM been there done that, and will soon be doing it again. I feel if you hate being a SAHM so bad, get a job.

    Answer by kiyad22 at 12:25 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • stay at home's are not lazy I did it for 12 yrs. and since I've started working I notice how much don't get done like it used too I knew my house would go to hell in a handbasket and it has the more I clean and try to keep it clean the messier it becomes cuz I'm no longer here to make sure it stays clean when you work you don't have much time to spend on your house and some things get neglected like laundry when I did stay home it was always done and nothing needed to be done or got behind so I look at it that way neither are lazy we all work our butts off to provide and care for our kids

    Answer by chica679 at 12:30 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • the mom who did the 1st post don't have a clue!

    Answer by chica679 at 12:31 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • I've done both. They both have their rewards and their challenges. I think that most people do not realize how much work actually goes into being a SAHM and vice versa.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:51 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Working is much easier than being at home all day, physically and mentally! I stayed at home for 6 months, until we couldnt afford it and i couldnt take it anymore. Now i work almost full time...but my house doesnt get as clean as it used to, and i dont put as much effort into cooking! its struggle for me to not be at home as far as time management but i atleast have my sanity!!!

    Answer by sweetstkissez22 at 12:57 PM on Nov. 24, 2009