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Is he cheating again?

I was 8 weeks pregnant with my daughter when I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me with his married boss! I left him and kicked him out of the house. We spoke maybe 5 times the whole time I was prego and the first time I saw him was the night our daughter was born in April. His married gf ended up going back to her husband when I was about 4 months prego. He started dating a new girl the night our daughter was born. He took me out for mothers day in May and I fell so hard for him again. He left his gf and I gave him another chance we officially got back together in June and everything has been going great up until about 3 weeks ago. I looked at his facebook page and found that he has been chatting with a girl and calling her sexy and saying he wants to come see her and lick her and so on. Should I be worried again? He chats on his comp all the time and I have no idea what he is doing! Someone please help!

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:34 PM on Nov. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • I hate to say it, but that doesn't sound good. It sounds like he needs to get his priorities straight. Maybe some counseling would work? He needs to decide if he wants to be a father and a partner or not. He can't have it both ways - you and your daughter deserve a lot better than that.

    Answer by beckcorc at 10:37 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Sorry, but it's confusing that you're questioning the morality of your formerly cheating bf telling another woman she's sexy and he wants her. You just answered your own question. Think, if your baby came to you as a teen or older "Mom my bf/husband did This Again to me". op, what would you tell your own child with that problem?

    He hurt you once while you were pregnant and on the night you gave birth. He's in heavy duty conversation with yet another woman. He has commitment problems and problems with realizing sex is more than hormonal. What's your self worth?

    Answer by lfl at 10:43 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Obviously he is cheating or is about to again. Please, for your and your daughter's sake, get rid of this guy. Do you want to go through this for the rest of your life?... b/c that is what's going to happen if you don't nip this in the bud. You can't change a natural born cheater...sorry, doesn't happen. Maybe he's a nice guy otherwise, but you're going to be miserable always wondering about him and what he's doing. Not worth it.

    Answer by moniquinha at 10:43 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Yes he is cheating. Kick his a** out and NEVER take him back. He has proven he is not relationship material and will make a sh**** father if that is the way he treats women.
    He does NOT love you and has no respect for women. He is a selfish a**hole. Leave him and find someone better.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:44 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • if he's not cheating yet, he will soon be.... follow your heart (yes I know it's a very Oprah thing to say but it's true) if you think he is, he probably is.... sorry :(

    Answer by Domsmom2009 at 10:48 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Yes. You should be married. The things he is saying alone accounts as cheating to me. I would definatley say that he is up to no good, and it doesn't sound like he'll ever change. He doesn't have any respect for you or your daughter if he chooses to be unfaithful, shady, and dishonest. You deserve better then what he can give you and he has proven this. Don't let yourself believe that he will eventually change. He has proven that he isn't going to change already. Cut your losses and move on to something better for you and your daughter.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:00 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • Chatting/Flirting often leads to cheating. Somehow talking thru e-mail and text etc. gives people a sense of anonimity that makes them feel free to say things they never would face to face. Flirtation is flirtation. How would he view it if the roles were reversed. Doubt he would think it innocent. Do what is best for you and your daughter. There are men who are worthy of your love and affection, but he is not one of them.

    Answer by JillianF at 11:01 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • I agree with the rest. If he wants to be with you he should respect you .. and he is obviously not doing that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • time to go...i've spent far too much of my life wondering what the men in my life were up to, it will kill you inside...move on and find a real man and never look your daughter gets older she'll pick up on his behaviors and think that it's normal in a relationship and allow men to trat her like shit dont want that for her....if nothing else, leave for your daughter's, i know from experience that you cant be a good mother when you're preoccupied with a cheating man...everyone makes mistakes, but he has proven that he has no desire to learn from his

    Answer by LoriaAnn at 11:49 PM on Nov. 24, 2009

  • I can understand forgiving him once, but this guy sounds like he isn't going to stop, and you and your feelings are not of his concern. I liked what another PP asked: "Do you really want to go through this for the rest of your life?" That's something you really need to think about. There are many women who have been in the same position that you and left to find a life of their own with their children, and ended up later on finding wonderful men who treat them like they should be treated. You could miss out on that if you stay with him. Get out, focus on your daughter, (You don't need smuts like that distracting you from all the little blessings of being a mommy), and enjoy your life--without him.


    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 AM on Nov. 25, 2009

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