Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I feel so bad for this baby, but I can do nothing. How do I urge my BIL to do something?

My BIL has a friend who had a daughter a few months after we had our son. The little girl is now just over 12 months old. Her father quit his job to be a "stay at home Dad." To him that means sitting in the basement playing video games and getting high all day while his daughter is either alone in her high chair or alone in her play pen in front of the TV. My BIL said that he has never seen a baby watch TV like this girl does. She'll watch cartoons for HOURS while her father is in a completely different part of the house (high). At best it's neglect and at worst it's child endangerment. The mother HAS to come home and smell the drugs and notice her daughter is not being cared for, I don't get how she wouldn't notice. I personally haven't witnessed any of this so I don't think I can report it. How can I convince BIL to report his friend?

I am so worried for this poor baby...

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:45 AM on Nov. 26, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (31)
  • Even though you didn't witness it I would call CPS anyway, at least then the child will get checked on.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 8:49 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • CPS, They might just walk in while he's getting high, that would be great, and I wouldn't feel guilty for trying to help, this is very sad for this baby. My cousins husband is the same way, she works full time, pays all the bills, everything, he does nothing!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:51 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • But isn't it just hearsay if I didn't see it? Is it enough for DCF to go on, the word of someone who doesn't even know their address? I know the guy, I've met the mom once or twice but I don't know where they live.

    I was up all night thinking about this poor baby because my husband just told me about it last night (he talked to his brother on the phone).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:52 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Go ahead and call and tell them your husband has wittnessed it. But just to let you know, if you do call, they might investigate you too, probably look through your house and check up on you every now and then, I've reported my ex husband before with his kid, and how he was with my kid. (Not that you'd have anything to worry about) just letting you know so maybe you could make sure your house was clean that day and you didnt decide to just let it wait, lol.. i've been there.. it was birthday so i was taking a day off, and i was emberrassed cuz my dishes were dirty. but the guy said my house was nice and clean.
    MJ_BN_FE

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 8:53 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • sorry not husband, Brother in law.
    MJ_BN_FE

    Answer by MJ_BN_FE at 8:55 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • They won't check on you guys, but they will investigate a call, they are serious.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:56 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Really? They'll investigate me for reporting them? Well I guess people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Luckily my house isn't glass in this case... I

    Maybe I can ask my BIL for their address. Ugh I didn't sleep at all last night thinking of all the things that could happen to this little girl while her father is so far away not even clear of mind.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:59 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Theres nothing wrong with giving CPS a tip off for somthing like this.
    This needs to be sorted out - obviously that child is being neglected - whether the parents understand or not, you can't just leave a baby alone all day infront of a TV - and the primary caregiver CANNOT be using drugs.

    Go ahead and call. Good luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:07 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • I've called and did it anonymously. Saw my neighbor kick her 18 month old.  I was never investigated for anything.

    MoonLover06

    Answer by MoonLover06 at 9:09 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Regardless of it being hearsay or not..better safe than sorry.
    keyaziz

    Answer by keyaziz at 9:20 AM on Nov. 26, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN