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If a girl is brought up with an antisocial father....

Everytime my dd goes to her dads, she says he doesn't pay much attention to her. His live in gf is at work most of the time, and he gets only 2 channels on his t.v. and doesn't take her to do anything outside his apartment. She can't go outside because the apartments are in a bad neighborhood. What options does she have? She is 15.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:55 PM on Nov. 26, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • She is over 12 she can legally choose not to go back over there. If he wants to see his daughter than they can meet in a park or something.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 PM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Bring a book, bring some homework, a deck of cards, hobbies, such as paper and pens, etc....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 PM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Legally that is correct, however, he would raise holy cain and she knows this and doesn't want to cause turmoil.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 PM on Nov. 26, 2009

  • Btw, my dd is a social girl who finds more interest in "doing things" than sitting with paper and pens.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:00 AM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • Who cares what she wants to do. Seriously. Kids are so spoiled. Have her bring *GASP* a BOOK or a deck of cards or a craft with her. Tell her to simply enjoy being with her dad. Gosh.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 AM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • Talk to her father about it, he needs to know that this is an issue for her and that she has no enjoyment being there under those conditions
    DianeMary

    Answer by DianeMary at 12:25 AM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • She is 15, she doesn't need to be "entertained" every minute of every day she spends with her father, she has plenty of time for a social life when she is home. Tell her to learn to entertain herself by reading a book or something. She just *might* find it interesting. Perhaps if she actually talked to her father, she could discover something he is interested in and actually get to know him on a more than superficial level. A person doesn't need 255 TV channels and a full social calendar to keep his child interested. It is quite possible he cancels all social engagements during the time she is to be staying at his house to--gasp!--spend time with her. (Only to have her come running back to complain that he lives too quietly.)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:26 AM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • This is OP and I lived with the man for 9 years of marriage. He suffers depression and the things she's talking about are true. He sleeps all day (while she is there). She feels isolated and alone while there, and while I don't expect great entertainement ventures, he is her parent and should at least be in the same room with her to "hang out" and also make and eat meals with her. She used to text me on her phone when she was bored, until he took her texting away saying it was costing him too much. Now she can't even call me or her friends because, again, he says she's wasting her minutes and its costing him too much. I have talked with her father about this. He "takes it into consideration" and then goes back to his bad habits.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 AM on Nov. 27, 2009

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