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Am I wrong not to want to give my baby my boyfriend's last name?

My boyfriend's last name is Muhammad. His dad decided that he wanted to up and switch religions and his first and last name and wanted his son to have an Islamic name. My boyfriend's dad then switched to another religion before he died. So my boyfriend is stuck with a Muslim name that I don't want to name our unborn son. Am I wrong to not like his name? I mean he's not muslim and why would I want to give our son a name that has no family meaning? Shouldn't I give him his paternal grandfather's legal name? I'm stuck here.

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mommy2be121609

Asked by mommy2be121609 at 7:38 PM on Nov. 27, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (13)
  • do you really not like it because its muslim? Muhammad would maybe be a good middle name maybe your bf would agree to that.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 7:49 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • Well lots of people have religious and cultural names that don't match them, so I don't think that's such a big deal.

    But my honest opinion - if boyfriend isn't going to commit to you enough to marry you, then you are not tied to commit any paternal name to the child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • My boyfriend feels like he can't help the name he was born with. He really doesn't want to change his name because he feels like its too much to go through and feels like a name is just a name. Its frustrating me because my due date is approaching and I've been trying to go over this with him since the middle of my pregnancy. I don't know if he feels like maybe me asking him to change his name or telling him that I don't like his name is me trying to change him or what. He really won't talk about it. He just says he can't help what his last name is and thats that. I've been trying hard to cooperate with him but if he doesn't help me out the baby will have my last name.
    mommy2be121609

    Answer by mommy2be121609 at 7:59 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • well it does sound like you are trying to change him and if you would give the baby his last name if it were another name other than muhammad then thats pretty shallow of you
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:06 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • I personally don't think kids should automatically get their father's last name. After all, what exactly did they contribute-- half a cell? And just what will they contribute afterwards, too? Have you gotten a binding, punishable if breached promise that he will support both you and the baby financially, emotionally, and spiritually? No? Then the baby should have your last name.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:30 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • definitly not... in some case the relationship never works out anyway so if you feel like it would be better to give your child your last name then do it!!!
    31angelmommy3

    Answer by 31angelmommy3 at 8:39 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • personally if I was not married then the child would be geting my last name. I have several freinds who have 2-3 kids all with different last names and not one of them is the mother's last name. I also don't think you are wrong for wanting to choose the grandfather's name either, but ultimately it is your choice.
    aeneva

    Answer by aeneva at 8:50 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • I think you should give your child your last name. That way there is no confusion. And it sounds like your boyfriend would not mind.
    sweetmoonem

    Answer by sweetmoonem at 8:57 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • You can give the baby any last name you want to. :) I'm giving my baby that I'm pregnant with my soon to be ex husband's name, and this isn't his kid. I'm keeping his last name when we get divorced so yeah... I just want me and my lil family all to have the same last name.
    Autumn22

    Answer by Autumn22 at 9:41 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

  • well besides sounding a bit racist why dont you guys just get married and he can take your last name it's not that hard to change it just the ss office is a bit of a bitch
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:20 PM on Nov. 27, 2009

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