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Should I late start my daughter who has a late fall birthday for kindergarten?

My daughter is very bright. She is the third born in our family. She is very close to her brother whose 19 months older than her. Her birthday is November 3rd. Cutoff in our district is December 2nd. I think she would probably do fine in kindergarten. I don't really want to send her to preschool 2 years in a row. I don't really like to think of her starting highschool when she is 13. That really bothers me. Also, outside of the home she is shy. However, she could be 10 years old and still be shy socially. I have been debating this question since she was two. I also have two that are younger than her and one has a simliar birthday. Thoughts on this anyone?

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michellerflores

Asked by michellerflores at 2:55 AM on Nov. 28, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (28)
  • My ex sil did that with my nephew, he had the hardest time, he's an extremely smart kid, he just couldnt handle the school atmosphere at that point, he had just turned 5 when she put him in. He's now 13 and still struggles a bit.
    summerm

    Answer by summerm at 2:58 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • I think that you know your kid better then anyone else.
    DS1 has behavior problems in school. And i was advised not to put him in Kindergarten. He's also young. b-day November 22nd. he just turned 5. But i put him in Kindergarten anyways. I did this because i felt it would be better for him to repeat kindergarten then preschool. There is more structure in K. And he already knows the standards for K so he'd be bored in preschool.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 3:16 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • i have known a girl who was put to start school 1 year ahead - he was student w/ me in grade school abroad. She was an excellent student, later studied for MS as I know, married one of our classmates and looks to be a successful person. She was born a bit late to her parents - her older brother was around 15 yrs older than she. She was a very good student. Straight As. For my child i would be all to sent him to the kindergarden or grade school a year ahead. I would only worry a bit for the time when he turns teen-age and runs into 'troublesome' for some children puberty period when those around him would be much younger and possibly not that mature. Would I be still the best mom or dad who he would turn to w/ any questions or would he rather ... run out of control? Other than that for the time being as I think of it, I wouldn't worry at all. But you know your kid better, how you rised others, would they help? I'd hope.
    baby133

    Answer by baby133 at 4:05 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • We have a kindergarten sign up and screening day. I would atleast bring her to that and let the teachers run their various academic and social skills tests. They will discuss with you whether they think she is ready and listen to your concerns. Its truly up to you if you send her or not but they should have some helpful advice either way.
    formykids373

    Answer by formykids373 at 6:57 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • I have read that studies say the youngest of the bunch tends to have psychological problems. I would hold her back. Do you want her a little younger than her friends when she is a teen, or a teeny bit older?
    I held my summer baby back a year, and she is full of confidence and getting straight As.
    Schools really have a bias towards having kids exactly where they should be, just so you know.
    Lovey1234

    Answer by Lovey1234 at 7:15 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • Well, the thing I would think about is that fact that you are not only putting her in kindergarten now, you are putting her into a situation where she will always be the youngest. She could be a full year younger than many of the kids she will be in school with. I agree that her shyness will probably not change in the next year, but I would be concerned about putting a child into a situation in which they will have a disadvantage. Like you said, she will be younger when she starts high school, even college....everyone will drive long before she does, etc. etc. She might be ready academically, but socially.....that is the question. And those issues can stay with a person forever and effect how they see themselves. The social aspect of school is just as important, in my opinion. Generally speaking, I would probably wait. In our area it wouldn't be a question because the cut-off is much earlier.
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 7:30 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • IDK about where you live, but here in MI if you miss the cuttoff by even a day you have to wait the whole year, so I would check policy before you even stress about it. They have to have a deadline for a reason, so most times they can't make exceptions.

    our cutoff is Dec 1, my DS is Nov 25th. We have yet to decide if he will go to kindergarten or young 5's
    peanutsmommy1

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 7:43 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • My oldest has a november 25th birthday. She's nine now, but the year she started kindergarten, she was four turning five but a lot of her classmates turned five in September including her best friend. So for the most part they are only a few months older than her. One the reverse side, she's in fourth grade and turned nine and is the youngest in her grade, however, there is a boy who shares her birthday and he turned 11, so it can go either way.

    I started her because she was ready. She continues to get all A's and is very active in sports and extracurriculars and has a lot of friends. She's not socially awkward at all. And to top it off, she's a type one diabetic which is something you would think would be an issue, but it isn't. She has been since 3 and all of her firends have always known she was so it isn't an issue.
    heatheryn

    Answer by heatheryn at 8:09 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • I would probably wait til next year and do preschool another year. My little boy will be in the same boat, but our cutoff here is a lot sooner. I can tell you that (as a kindergarten teacher), we have parents say they wish they had waited a year, but never that they were sorry for waiting. We have seen some very intelligent children struggle with social skills and maturity later (not necessarily in their Kindergarten year). My sister in-law waited with both of hers because of late birthdays, she sent her kids to Kindercare during what would have been their kindergarten year, and then they started when they were 6. They did extremely well when they finally went, are really smart, and I think she would tell you that she never has regretted waiting. Hope this helps!
    Shelby72

    Answer by Shelby72 at 8:15 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • Both of my daughters had cut offs AFTER the date-one just 8 hours. Both were MORE than ready for kindergarden.
    I was able to enroll them in a private school, and they both did pretty well. One is in college now, maintaining a 4.0 average for the second year in a row, and the other is in her senior year of high school, and doing better socially then acedemically (but that was always the case with her)
    It really is a very individual to the child kind of issue.
    Tea4Tas

    Answer by Tea4Tas at 8:29 AM on Nov. 28, 2009

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