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my little girl isn't little anymore :(

shes 12 yrs old and i was going through her cell phone and i was reading her texts and she was talking with one of her "guy" friends about how "good" the sex they had last saturday was. I'm devistated, shes my little girl and shes only 12, i thought i raised her right, how do i talk to her about this, i'm freaking out!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:41 PM on Nov. 28, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (12)
  • Im not bashing you or anything im trying to help you by this. Honestly i dont agree with a 12 year old texting on a cell phone. I would take the cell phone anytime she isnt out with her friends other then when she is out take the phone. Because shes obviously making these plans with the help of her cell phone because if she didnt have the phone she wouldnt be able to call the boy to find out where to meet or anything.

    Goodluck Mommy
    Mommy2babie

    Answer by Mommy2babie at 7:48 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • 12 yrs old and having SEX??? I would be making an appointment for her at the Doctors office for Monday and put this child (YES CHILD) on the pill and then find out who the hell this BOY is and speak with his parent/s. She is 12 not 18 and she is having sex she can get pregnant at anytime she could be as we are speaking.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:01 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • I might start a conversation with her by saying a mom on here wrote about her 12 year old daughter is having sex. Then, go into does she know anyone in her grade who has sex. And see what she says. When my son was 11, he asked me what oral sex is because a girl said she would do it for him. So, it's out there. You have to start the conversation some how.

    Good luck!
    kjrn79

    Answer by kjrn79 at 8:02 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • I would just bust her. Tell the truth and take the cell phone. 12 is too young to have a cell phone, IMO, and she obilviously isn't responsible enough for it. Take her to the doctor and get her checked out and on the pill. If she were my daughter, she wouldn't see the light of day for a very LOOOOONNNNNNGGGG time.
    Cindy18

    Answer by Cindy18 at 8:45 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • I don't agree with a 15 year old having a cell phone, let alone a 12 year old. I think that's a problem in itself for you, as she has too many outlets to be secretive. If you found the texts then you need to just come out and tell her you found them. She's going to freak out and probably act like a child and throw a fit. Don't let her reaction keep you from being the parent in this situation. Personally, I would take the cell phone from her and she would most definately be grounded. No interaction with the outside world for as long as I could get away with it. School and that's it. Take her to the doctor. Get her checfked out for STD's and other infections, then get her on the pill. You're not going to stop her from trying this again, you can at least try to protect her from it. Make sure you get her to spill about what happened, so you know without a shadow of a doubt that she used protection. I would wring my child's neck.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 9:26 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • Call the police
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:18 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • Maybe it was just a joke? Hope that it was just a joke. But it's possible that she is having sex. My next door neighbor and best friend lost her virginity at age 12 to a 17 y.o.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:39 PM on Nov. 28, 2009

  • Confront her about the texts. You pay the phone bill, right? U have a right to know what you are paying for. Then take the phone away. Open the door to a conversation about sex and what she thinks sex is? Maybe what you think and she thinks are different things? Is it intercourse, oral sex, touching, etc? Now is the time to let her talk and you listen and keep communication open. Then try to be open and take her to a female doctor who she can feel open with.
    seasidegrandma

    Answer by seasidegrandma at 11:12 PM on Nov. 29, 2009

  • i have a 12yr old sd thats had thrown a fit for a cell phone since the begining of the year..i have told her a million times shes not old enough for one..she is pretty mad at me about it and she thinks another family member is giving her money for xmas..so she is planning on taking that money to buy one...needless to say its not gonna happen...i feel shes just way too young for a phone i mean really where does she go without me? Nowhere!!! Im glad you posted on your situation to confirm my thoughts as to why a child this age should not have one..I am very sorry for you situation, I would def bust her if i were you and def get her checked for std's and on the pill just in case! Children this age are already sneaky enough to me...def be sure!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:23 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • when and where is she out that this was able to happen? mega-rules and restrictions time!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:11 PM on Nov. 30, 2009

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