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have you ever had a drastic change in looks? How did you deal with it?

I've always been "the fat girl" or "the fat friend".. I never thought I was much to look at anyway. I've seen tons of pretty bigger women, I was just never one of those. I didnt care about how I dressed. It was always baggy oversized clothes to hide my body. I never even had a boyfriend until I was 20(he is now my DH). I got the Gastric bypass a year ago. Ive lost over 80 lbs. My Highest weight was 278. So I still have more to lose but im not nearly as big as I was or felt! People notice me now, men hit on me, people tell me I look good. I dont know how to take a compliment from years of teases instead of compliments. I see myself and still feel like im the fat girl.. I dont know how to handle the attention now. I dont want it! My DH loved me when no one else did and for that he will always hold a special place in my heart... I have this new look but I feel the same about myself??? im confused?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:29 AM on Nov. 30, 2009 in Diet & Fitness

Answers (4)
  • From what I've heard, this is a very normal thing to feel after gastric bypass surgery. There may be some groups here on cafemom that could help you and you may find people that relate to you. As far as the compliments go, just say thank you and that's all. Find some activities that you can do that help you to feel good about yourself that way you really believe it! Good for you! It will take time to adjust but you will do fine!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:38 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • just ignore

    Answer by hgirl2009 at 1:38 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • A lot of ppl gain the weight back bc they can't deal with the new attention. Just have confidence in who you are as a person so that doesn't happen to you.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:31 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • p.s. I was not overweight as a young person. I didn't gain until after 40. After 14 surgeries I gained 80 lbs. I lost 50 and guys who wouldn't date me fat wanted to take me out. I refused. If they didn't like me as a person (fat or not) then they didn't deserve to go out with me when I lost the weight. People like that are shallow and upset me so bad I could spit. Your man sounds like a great person and saw the true you from the start.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:34 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

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