Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Hemorrhoids, sex life, and being self conscious.

Okay, so a few days ago I noticed that I was having a small rectal pain and I thought that maybe it was due to some aggressive play that me and my husband had. So a couple of days go by and I use a mirror to check it out to see if I had any cuts or anything and when I looked in the mirror I saw that I had a hemorrhoid. Then I went to my husband and told him that okay we have to take it easy on the anal play because I got injured last time. And he said are you sure it's not hemorrhoids. I said yes and that was it. So of course I know that it is a hemorrhoid. But the fact that he said it so quickly leads me to assume that he has seen it during intercourse. And I just assume he has never said anything to me. Now that I have discovered that I do have one, and when I bend over I can see it I am very self conscious about it. I don't want to have sex anymore during the day, or in the light and all I've explained to my ..(cont)..

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on Nov. 30, 2009 in Health

Answers (6)
  • ..(cont).. husband is that I am having body issues at the moment and I only want to have sex in the dark or at night and not spontaneously anymore. Has anyone ever felt this way because of this? Is there anything that I can do to have them go away quicker? Should I talk to him about more specifically why I’m having issues? I have it in my head that showing him the ‘unattractive side’ of me will push him away. Any thoughts? Please let me know your opinion good or bad.. Thanks.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • Um, I don't know.. I wouldn't really care, because anal sex is not something I really enjoy. There are other things to do sexually that doesn't involve the butt Hon. If you have sex like that, then quite honestly, what do you expect to happen? It's not designed for sex... hence the non-lubrication part....

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:52 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • I have butt crack hair, when I haven't shaved I don't let him behind me. He really doesn't care, but I feel like if he sees it he wont think I'm hot anymore.

    i'm sorry I cant be of more help, Ive never had hemorrhoids, but I think you'll find alot of mothers here who are subconscious about their bodies.

    Answer by Christina2135 at 11:56 AM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • I must be in a jacked up relationship because my husband has taken pictures of my hemorrhoids when they flare up just so I can see how bad they really are. Granted, I am not into anal sex, but when I have a flare up I don't even want vaginal or oral sex because it's so uncomfortable. I am more self conscious about my elongated boobs from pregnancy and breasfeeding than a varicosed blood vessel in my butt.

    Again, I guess I am weird...

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:39 PM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • roflmao...sweetie if ur man only loves u because ur hot then ur relationship is in deeeep trouble. love is accepting that person for who they r...everyone loses their looks eventually, it's called getting older. u want to be with someone who u can grow old with, sex won't always be possible, so u better have something in common with ur man that u can talk about. don't actually care what a woman looks like naked...they're just happy to get to see a naked woman...

    Answer by dherrington at 1:12 PM on Nov. 30, 2009

  • i get self conscious too! and i have had only one hemorrhoid so far in my entire life (hope i dont have anymore lol) and i didnt want him to mess with me either. but my problem is (and i really wanted to go anon. but im trying to be strong lol) i have skin tags down there that developed after i got pregnant, and they are ugly and it devestated me but he says he loves me for me. i think sometimes when you can truly be comfortable with a guy and show him your "unattractive side" that it is actually more attractive! because then he knows you are completely comfortable with him. so if he loves you dont worry about it! it will go away and you can do it with the lights on again lol just express your feelings and maybe you guys can dimmly (sp?) light the room!

    Answer by danette624 at 10:25 PM on Nov. 30, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.