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Did anyone get married too fast & then divorce just a few years later?

I just don't get it. My BIL is now getting a divorce after being married for only 2 years. When he married his current wife, they only knew eachother for a few months. He had asked her to move in & she said "only if you can marry me" so the doofas marries her, & 2 years later...they are already divorcing. This is his second time doing this to. His first marriage only lasted about 3 years.

Why do people do this? Don't you want to get to know the person you're about to marry?

I know though, that sometimes hasty marriages work out for some people. But, i just don't get why people refuse to get to know the person before marriage.....I'm just venting & curious if anyone else has been through quick marriages like this. Maybe they can shed some light.

Answer Question
 
samurai_chica

Asked by samurai_chica at 12:07 PM on Dec. 1, 2009 in Relationships

Level 35 (74,081 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Many ppl marry for the wrong reasons so it won't last. My first marriage lasted 3 months (not years but months). I wanted out of my mom's house so I married the first guy that came along that would marry me and get me out of her evil clutches.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:10 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • I got married 4 months after my ex and I moved in together, and we got divorced 3 yrs later. He was a liar and a cheater, and honestly, I wouldn't have known about that stuff even if I had waited longer to marry him, b/c he didn't start until after the wedding. He even told me he waited until after the wedding b/c "it made it next to impossible for you to leave me, which means I stand a better shot at getting away with it".

    I don't think that length of time necessarily has anything to do with why it's ending, though, in all cases. My mom and dad knew each other only about 4-5 months before they got married, and they've been happily married for 33 yrs. Sometimes you just know, right from the start, that this person is the one and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them. I think in some of the cases where they didn't know each other that long, it's more...con't
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:11 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • that they ignored the signs that the relationship won't work out long term b/c they are still caught up in the rush of new love and lust.

    My boyfriend and I have only been together a short time, but we are already talking about living together. We know it's moving fast, but we also know that we love each other very much and have gotten to know each other very well (since he's an otr truck driver, we have lots of time to do nothing but talk), so we're ready to take that next step. Will marriage follow? I don't know. I think I want it to, but we'll see how things go.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:13 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • OMG, did your brother marry Ronnie? The last time I saw her she was on her 7th divorce from quick marriages like you described. That was several years ago, so she's probably on 9 by now.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:13 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • My ex husband and I dated for 5 years and then got married. It lasted 6 months. My current husband and I married after 4 months of knowing each other. I know he's not going anywhere and he makes me so happy but a few months wasn't long enough to find out that he had outbreaks of herpes. They come maybe once every year. We've been married 4 years but a few months is definately not long enough to know hidden things about a person.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • I think a lot of people these days take marriage very lightly - which is why there's such an astronomical divorce rate. People know that if it doesn't work out, they'll just go get divorced. I think especially where children are involved it should be a long, very slow process but unfortunately it doesn't work that way.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 1:53 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • I've often wondered that myself. Maybe getting a divorce is "too easy."
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:27 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • Well, I did it. We met in church, went to premarital counseling. We waited until our wedding night, agreed on not only the big things but also the little things. Had the same spiritual beliefs. Everything was perfect. We were married less then a year when I found out that he was cheating on me, that he was gay, that he poisoned me. That he wasn't a christian. We (I) worked on our marriage for more then a year after that, he had spells when he would "change" I thought. But it never happened. I now know that we could have dated for years and I would have never know any more about him then I knew after only a few months dating. He's a sociopath and an expert liar. Sometimes life slaps you in the face.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • i married my first husband after a year of dating, and that marriage lasted about 6 months, he was stubborn, selfish, a chronic liar and cheater...I dont think I would have known before we were married becuz hes a very good actor and was a mister of music at his church, go figure, i remarried after knowing my current DH for 1year and 5 months...we have our moments and sometimes he really gets on my nerve but we love eachother to death and we have no intentions what so ever to divorce.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:00 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

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