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How do you explain homosexuality to a child?

My 7 year old was watching a movie (Big Daddy) in hindsight it may not have been a good choice to let him watch it but I was just thinking of how cute the little boy in the movie is when I put it on. In one scene two men kiss, of course this lead to questions. At first I tried to ignor it, with the thought that it would just be forgotten, but when he asked again I told him..."Just like some men are attracted to women there are men that are attracted to men and women who are attracted to women." I left it at that but felt that maybe I should have given a better explination.


Asked by momisabrat at 1:02 PM on Dec. 1, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (57)
  • For 7, you gave a good answer, and now you have time to think about how much more and in what way you want to explain it more when the next set of questions come.

    Answer by Pnukey at 7:29 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • eh, I'm not a hateful person, but I'm not a tolerant person either. So IMO I wouldn't explain it, if I HAD to I would say its abnormal.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:09 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • Touchy one. I think that if he brings it up again then you can assume you didn't comletelly answer his question to satisfy his curiosity.

    I would just add that at some point most boys will like girls. Just like your dad and I feel attracted to each other. Make some examples and ask him why he is concerned? Did he think it was weird? Find out why it stuck on his head among the other scenes.

    Good luck and remember that our kids minds are like a white canvas we have to be very selective what gets unprinted on it.

    Answer by bebita at 1:10 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • I think that you gave a good explaination for his age. He will learn more about it in school, and he just actually will accept it that some people are that way.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:13 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • That's what I told my kids when they first asked me too. They asked me what "gay" meant and I told them what you told yours. It seemed to anwer their question for then and I always just try to tell them what they ask and not put my own spin on it. Later when they were older they had more questions about it and I had to go into more detail.. ahem... but I think he will let you know when he is ready for any more info. Just go by his lead. WIth the whole prop 8 same sex marriage issue last yr in Ca where we live it brought up a lot of other questions then too and I took that opportunity to share my views about it with them since they seemed to be trying to figure out what to think of all the controversy... It's hard but we want them to learn it from us so we get the tough jobs, right mom?

    Answer by momrocks1000 at 1:13 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • I think that you gave a good explaination for his age.

    I agree with this answer. at this age, you don't need to give a detailed description. I'm sure that there will be more questions later, deal with them at that time when he's more mature.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 1:15 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • I think your answer was good, my kids haven't asked specifically yet, but I've already laid the dd asked if only boys and girls get married and I said that no, sometimes boys marry boys and sometimes girls marry girls. She was fine with that. I will tell my kids that sometimes boys and girls love eachother and sometimes boys and boys and sometimes girls and girls and that is what is most important is the love they share, not who they love.

    Shame on you anon :09, and you're kidding yourself if you don't think you are hateful, your response shows you most certainly are.

    Answer by gramsmom at 1:41 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • It's not hard. "Some boys like boys and some girls like girls." End of conversation. Had that talk with the kids when they were like 3 or 4. It's been a non-issue with them ever since. If they see two girls or two guys kissing/holding hands on TV or in real life it doesn't effect them any more then seeing straight couples. All of it grosses them out and they make a huge deal with the gagging and dying because it's so icky to watch, lol. They do the same thing if they catch me and my husband kissing. My 8yo son is always like, "Um, I'm in the room."
    I really don't see what else there is to explain.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 3:19 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • nope, you did good. That's all he needs to hear. If he wants to know more he will ask

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:33 PM on Dec. 1, 2009

  • No, not hateful at all anon:09. Here's hoping your kid turns out better.

    Just tell him that the two guys are dating, going out, whatever term you prefer. I'm sure he's seen plenty of people kissing before, it's no big deal.

    Answer by RhondaVeggie at 5:05 PM on Dec. 1, 2009