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Do you and your SO fight about sex?

My fiance and I have been fighting a lot about sex lately -- we have 2 boys, ages 2 and 4, I work full-time, and I am about 3 months pregnant with TWINS... yet he thinks that we should be having sex at least every other day. I know that doesn't sound like too much... but it is for me. It is hard to try and fit it in when I work night shift... so once the kids are in bed, it's time for me to go to work... then we are both busy during the day. So it's not really either of our faults.... yet he blames me and bitches about it all the time.

It has gotten to the point that I am ready for us to split up because I feel like this is always going to be his top priority and he is never going to be satisfied with me. In my opinion, he is waaaay too worried about sex. I mean, why can't we have a happy and healthy relationship that isn't TOTALLY dependent on whether or not we have sex as much as he wants it?

 
JenMarie2007

Asked by JenMarie2007 at 1:50 PM on Dec. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,208 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • I understand your frustration. This is when it is important to come to some sort of comprimise. Perhaps you should schedule sex three times a week or something like that. If it is not a sex day and he needs some relief, then he needs to go take care of himself. It is sometimes hard to get in the mood during pregnancy especially if you are working full-time. He needs to be more considerate of that. Sometimes you need an objective third party to make him see these things. In that case marriage counseling might be a good option. This problem is fixable and its going to take some comprimise on both sides. GL
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 1:57 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • man u got a lot going on in ur life. he really should be more reasonable, if i were u i'd be lucky to fit in 2x a week, i dunno maybe he just wants it to stay healthy n fun. tell him u'll try ur best but he should try to be more understanding. i mean come on,
    fefe87

    Answer by fefe87 at 1:54 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • I'd have a talk about what's important to both of you. he's your fiance and the father to your kids, and i'm sure you love and want him to be happy.
    there's a saying....you make time for things that are important to you. so find the time, but finding the time is his JOB too!!!! Tell him to do some stuff that would allow for your schedule to ease up!
    Then there are those quickies!!!! LOL
    Hang in there...I know how you feel! I have a 2 1/2 yr old, 11m twins and i'm preggo, due in august!
    PS....the relationship should not depend on sex...
    sandypops

    Answer by sandypops at 1:56 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • Maybe you need to introduce him to Rosie Palm and her five sisters...
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 1:58 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • Because women and men think differently on this. Sex is very important to men. Sex is to a man what conversation is to a women. When a women deprives her man of sex for days, even weeks on end, it is tantamount to refusing to talk to her for days , even weeks. It is important to find that time for one another. It will make you both happier in the end. Just show him that he is needed.
    ZachsMom325

    Answer by ZachsMom325 at 1:59 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • My EX and I did. He'd put his stuff in my face and he smelled like pussy. So I'm pretty damn sure he was still with his alleged ex girlfriend. Nauseating. Nasty. The least he could have done was wash up, but he used to beat me, so he obviously didn't give a rats ass about me.
    DreamingOfMyDay

    Answer by DreamingOfMyDay at 2:00 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • I don't want to sound selfish either... I realize he has "needs," but I think that at this point in time, he should be thinking about ME and our unborn babies and what he can do to help me out and make life less stressful for me.... instead of making it MORE stressful by constantly bitching that he doesn't get laid enough! Sometimes, I just want to run him over with my car... LoL.. j/k.... kinda : )
    JenMarie2007

    Answer by JenMarie2007 at 2:18 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • We used to, until we found out he has depression. I wanted it all the time, and he never did. I try not to bother him about it anymore, considering his mental state, but sometimes I get so frustrated that he knows I'm upset about it. That usually starts a little quarrel.
    liz1986

    Answer by liz1986 at 2:35 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • I am leaving my relationship because it has been ten years he thought we should have a relationship where it did not depend on sex or whether or not we had it or not. Maybe you should tell him how he can make it less stressful for you and tell him what you want from the relationship. Good luck!!

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 3:09 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

  • men need to have that relase of ther frustration! lol. but i fell ya. when i go to work my husbands getting off and by the time i get home i need to go to bed. we are about 12 weeks pregnant with just one. i try and keep him happy ie blow jobs every few days and sex in the wee hrs of the morning like when he wakes up..hell just last night i got told at 1 in the am to roll over! lol. i gave in. it was great. try and tlak with him.
    sandraberke

    Answer by sandraberke at 3:59 PM on Dec. 2, 2009

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