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divorce papers given.

I received divorce papers and I am so upset that he would do this.. married 15 years with 4 children. I told him i will get a lawyer and he has to pay and he tells me his lawyer will do everything. SHOULD I GET MY OWN....THEERE is not much no money he works 2 jobs and we still live paycheck to paycheck , the only thing is the kids and his pension from both jobs and the kids. I would have to go back to work and I am considering letting him take care of two and I take care of two, what do you think) suggetions.. is this a good idea. I never thought he would do this, i am confused and sometimes think he is going through mid life crisis. (43 years old) always worked hard to support us well for 9 years since I stopped working to be a stay at home mom (which i don't reqret).

Should i get my own lawyer even if it means he has to pay for it. We already have no money this will take from the pension because there is no savin

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Lil4babies

Asked by Lil4babies at 3:51 PM on Dec. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • He does NOT have to pay for your lawyer. It would be a conflict of interest for him to be paying for services for you since he'd actually be the paying client. Some judges might tell him to pay later in the proceedings but not always. If you agree on all things then use his lawyer. If not then go to Legal Aid. My first and second husband and I used just one lawyer and it worked for us.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:07 PM on Dec. 3, 2009

  • I don't recommend splitting the children up unless they are older and choose to be. They are going to need each other. It may make things easier on you and your husband but not them. I'd also go to legal aid and get a lawyer. My ex tried to talk me into only using his lawyer and it really would have messed me over. Found out if I had I would have lost out on almost everything.
    baconbits

    Answer by baconbits at 4:30 PM on Dec. 3, 2009

  • You need your own lawyer. I'm sorry to say! But it's best. You MUST protect yourself and your children and the only way to do that is to have your OWN legal representation.

    Your questions are so personal and hard for anyone to really answer what is a good decision or not. If you are truly focused on your children and their healthiest interests, then any decisions you make will be the right ones. And hopefully your soon to be ex will also be completely focused on what's best for the kids too.
    TLALONDE16

    Answer by TLALONDE16 at 6:25 PM on Dec. 3, 2009

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