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How can I get my friend out of this mental/physical abusive relationship?

I am really angry! My best friend and I are 22 years old and sometimes she acts like she is 12. She dates this pathological liar who does nothing but cheat on her, abuse her, steals from her and puts her through hell. When she first met him, he claimed he was 21 when she was 20... turns out he was 17 which means he is now 19. He has also gotten 3 other girls pregnant while being with my best friend and she was pregnant too, beat her when she was pregnant with their baby (She had the baby girl in July) so she pressed charges against him, then when he got out of jail, let him live with her. They've been on this roller coaster for three years and it keeps getting worse. She won't stop. She knows he is a liar, yet believes everything he says. Her family hates him, I hate him... what should I do?

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:35 AM on Dec. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Troll...

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:41 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Well, I think your friend may feel like she doesn't deserve better or that's all she is worthy of. Which is NOT true. Women do not deserve to be treated like that by any man. I think your friend needs to walk away from this. It will not get any better unless he gets help and most of the time it takes years and years to heal. It's obvious that he grew up unhappy so he has to take it out on someone else. If he is a pathological liar like you say he is, lying about his age and cheating on her the way he did... no one deserves that. Your friend should walk away while she is still alive. And three other "baby mamas", that would never work.

    I strongly hope that she leaves and seeks help soon. Please continue to be her friend and inspire her to do better, to think better, to want better. Hopefully things will change soon!!

    Hope I helped, keeping you all in prayer!!!


    Answer by Valerie42 at 12:47 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • stay out of it, as matter of fact run! dont let her tell u stories,just say u dont wanna hear it.

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 12:48 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • yeah, well, she obviously doesn't listen when others try to help so jsut leave her to her own devices...really, if she's dumb enough to stick around with a guy like that she isn't worth it....

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:34 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • There's nothing you can do. Been there, done that. My now-ex-BFF is still with the man who emotionally abuses her & their twin daughters. I tried for a long time to convince her to leave, that she could do better, but she always went back to him. Finally, I told him off in a very public way & told her that I couldn't take the drama that she was bringing into my life anymore. It was toxic to me & was bringing me WAY down... I just couldn't do it anymore. In the end it all comes down to the fact that for whatever sick reason, they want to stay. She will have to find her own turning point.

    Answer by emslala at 1:37 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

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