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He is about to be 6 at the end of December. He has always been a germ freak. Always washes his hands and face the minute he gets a little dirty, even when he plays outside. well, when he first was getting potty trained he did everything fine, but when he was about 3 he was wiping and got poop all over his hand, so now he refuses to wipe himself. He doesn't go anywhere, unless I am close. I have been wiping ever since and my husband hates it and wants me to just stop, but I tried and he sat on the toilet for over 30 min until i came. what do you think

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:09 AM on Dec. 5, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (10)
  • I cant help because my daughter is the same way she's his age also hope you get some good advise :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:14 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • If you didn't do it for him he'd eventually have to do it himself, right?? So by giving in after 30 min. all you are teaching him is that is he pouts long enough you will cave. (That's my opinion of course, I am in no way an expert and not trying to be harsh, just honest). At 6 yrs old he is perfectly capable. Who does like wiping their butt? it's gross for all of us but it has to be done!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Next time he calls you to wipe him, take him a bottle of water in case he gets thirsty while he's sitting there, because you are NOT wiping his bottom. You said he knows how, he just won't, offer a refresher course if he has forgotten how to do it himself and possibly those handy dandy toddler potty wipes Huggies makes for cleaner clean ups, close the door and walk away. That's just stubborness, nothing wrong with him, he just knows you will do it, and it's battle of wills. Sitting on the potty won't hurt him anymore than sitting anywhere else. Two reasons I know this: 1) Just this week I cured my 3 yo of peeing on the toilet seat by sitting him right on it, and telling him that's what happens to me, he now understands. If yours has to put up with a slimy butt, or do it himself, he'll take care of it. 2) I WAS that stubborn kid, I used to sit in my room plotting how I was going to hold out longer than my mom. I rarely did.

    Answer by ShelleyB64 at 3:31 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • I agree with all the others. Let him sit there. Its simply a battle of wills. Let him know that everyone else wipes their own ass and that he is old enough to do the same! Maybe provide him with some wipies :)
    My friends daughter did the same thing to her, until she spent the weekend at my house. I potty trained that girl and I would of been damned if I wiped her ass at 6 yrs old. So I used peer pressure. I told the othere kids (my own and another one) what she wanted me to do. Simple. They teased her about not being a "big" kid. She never asked anyone to wipe her ass again!

    Answer by momsbreak5654 at 5:07 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • I like ShelleyB's answer. Tough love momma. Time for some tough love.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:35 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Let him sit there. He is old enough to wipe his own butt. No one is going to help him wipe his butt at school. Get him some big kid wipes and have him use those. This needs tough love like the other posters said.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:36 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • He is old enough, but he got dirty and still remembers it, why not offer up some sort of prize? If you do it for a week we will go to Chucky Cheese etc...... I would also point out it isn't going to hurt him if it gets on his hands, but could if it stays there, if he is a germaphobe, tell him he only has 5 minutes to get it off or it will make him sick,,IDK hubby is a total germ freak and had bathroom issues like this when he was younger, mild OCD I call it! I think you get more with positive encouragement than negative! Good luck MOM!

    Answer by kimigogo at 3:25 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • I agree with the others. Let him sit there until he grows facial hair or decides to wipe his own butt, whichever comes first. At 6 years old, he's plenty old enough to wipe his own butt. We had a birthday party a couple of years ago for my youngest son, and one of the little girls went to the bathroom ( she was 6 at the time) and was in there for a while, and I checked on her and she asked me to wipe her. I said, "No ma'am. You are 6 years old, you are in kindergarten, you can wipe your own bottom. Now do it, flush the toilet and wash your hands and get out of the bathroom because there are 2 other kids waiting to use it.". I seriously doubt her kindergarten teacher wiped her butt every day at school. I certainly wasn't going to do it. I quit wiping my boys' butts when they were fully potty trained.

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 3:32 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • at least he wants you to do it. My son just leaves major skid marks in his under wear. I can not seem to get it through his head he HAS to wipe his butt.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 3:35 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • I think it's normal. My daughter is the same way. At least, she was. I've been trying and I think I finally got it through to her, that if she gets poo on her finger, she has to wash her hands after she wipes anyway. I also told her I am tired of finding poo in her underwear, because I have to wash them before I even wash them. I also told her that she's not going to have any friends if she goes to school smelling like shit. Yes. In those words...HARSH, but she got it. When she's home, she is finally in the habit of WASHING UP after she goes number two.

    Answer by WatermelonNerd at 8:52 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

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