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How do you and your DH split the holidays up among your family?

Do you alternate years that you spend with each family or do you house-hop? And how do you handle it if your in-laws live in another state?

Right now me and DH alternate years with having Thanksgiving with my family and his. And for Xmas we used to house-hop but when our kids got old enough to understand Xmas and want to play with their toys, I started having Xmas dinner at my house and my family comes over but his won't. I do invite them though. And then so Dh never gets to see his family on Xmas and I kinda feel bad but tell myself it's really their fault. And now his parents are moving down South in the spring and so I'm wondering if Im going to have to give up having Xmas at my house to go down there.

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Asked by LadyEb at 9:53 AM on Dec. 5, 2009 in Holidays

Level 10 (446 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • We always had a big family Christmas and all got together. Everyone in the family was welcome, but now everyone is all over the country. my dad doesn't really celebrate Christmas anymore and my mom volunteers for the homeless. me and dh and dd a ds have peaceful celebration with lots of snacks all day.

    Answer by writeon at 9:59 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • My parents live in CA and I live in IL....they usually fly us out there for Christmas, and we don't mind it, because my in laws don't have much tradition or happenings and we're with them ALL YEAR ROUND! I don't feel bad leaving them because they get to see us the whole year...unless my parents come out.
    I've decided to start having holiday celebrations seperate from them...or at least do our own thing and invite them to our home because the past few holidays they've failed to do anything. :( sad but true.
    It's unfortunate that his family does not make the effort to come see you....I wouldn't feel bad not going to them, just for the fact that they make no effort on thier part...if that makes sence? :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • My father very politely gave up Thanksgiving when the kids started getting married. All the sibs spend thanksgiving with their in laws.

    Christmas eve is with hubby's family (he has an aunt and uncle that live here). They are Italian and do a HUGE 7 fish dinner Christmas eve. My family is done on Christmas day.

    Every couple of years we go skiing for the holidays with hubby's sis and parents. On those years we simply dont see my side during the holidays.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:11 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • My family is spread all over -- parents in FL, sister in NM, and my brother in IL. We're in NY. So we spend all holidays with my husband's family. We usually have Thanksgiving here and then Christmas as my SIL's. However, now that my son is 15 months we're going to start having Christmas here and probably get together with everyone on CHristmas Eve -- or try to!

    We go to Florida every year to visit my parents and my entire family comes here once a year to come see us.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:17 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Oh Honey.. to me that ends when you start having your own family. NO time for that bull crap... too busy with my own family. If they want to come visit me at my home, so be it. Otherwise, forget it. I only please my immediate family.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Since I don't see/speak to ANYONE on my side of the family, I've made it very easy for my husband! LOL But we do rotate who hosts Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Easter (as well as a summer BBQ's and lesser holidays like Mother's/Father's Day). This year one of my SILs hosted Thanksgiving, I/we will host Christmas Day, and my MIL hosted Easter. My husbands brothers and sisters celebrate the "eves" with their in-laws.

    Answer by LoriKeet at 10:23 AM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • We used to do that when we lived in the Midwest, and it always sucked dividing up a couple of days between four different relatives' houses. It was stressful and never any fun. Since we moved away from most of our family, it's so much better! We have my dad, stepmom, and grandmother over to our house for Xmas Eve. Then on Xmas day, my husband, kids, and I go to a casino for brunch.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 12:53 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Honestly, this is kinda horrible...but we always spend them with my family. All of my family lives in Indiana, where we are...and his all lives in California. I'm super close to my family, and I suppose I'm selfish, but I can't stand to be away from them on the Christmas. He knew this when we started dating. His mom usually visits for a week, a couple of days after Christmas. My husband isn't as close to his family, and doesn't mind the arrangement, though.

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:23 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • We go to my dad's family the Saturday before Christmas. We rotate X-mas Eve and Day with my mom's family and his family every year. This year Eve is with the inlaws, and day is with mine. Next year will be the reverse.

    Answer by KairisMama at 3:06 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • no, we dont split the holidays. we stay at home with our son and spend the holiday with him since my mom and his grandmother passed away we dont get together with any one from either family... i know... its sad

    Answer by shorty13417 at 5:55 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

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