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Has this happened to anyone?

I have a career. twice divorced, with a 13 y/o son. Had 2 abortions and one ectopic pregnancy in '04. My BF of 6 yrs always avoided having children. When I found out of my pregnancy on our first yr. togeth., he asked me if I was keeping it. It was an ectopic, I lost it. We are now engaged and at 40 I have decided that this is it. I am now on Nuva Ring, and determined not to have any kids. But it hurts realizing that my plans won't come true. I am miserable, especially during my period and PMS. I have tried to leave him and be miserable by myself, but he wants to stay with me. He does not have any kids, and I feel that one day he will have one with someone else. He says he only wants a baby with me, but time will tell. Some people have no job and 5 kids; others like me are financially secured, but onlyhave one child. We make mistakes like getting pregnant too young, from the wrong man & cant never go back to correct


Asked by Anonymous at 5:46 PM on Dec. 5, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Look forward, sweetie, and don't pay attention to the anon bitches. Knowing that you did abort two healthy pregnancies and now you want one so badly has got to be incredibly painful. I know what ectopic is like. I know you're in pain. What about giving it one more shot? Just trying one more time? And if that doesn't work, then adopting? I think you would make a great adoptive mother!

    Good luck, hun. and like a PP said, try to cherish the son you have and the great career and the future you have with this wonderful man. He's NOT gonna go have a baby with someone else. Know your options and give love. That's all you can do :)

    Answer by Ati_13 at 6:22 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • So u dont want a baby and he does?? 2 abortions!!!! thats horrible

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:51 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • well stop looking back.. there is nothing you can do to change the past.
    you have a teenager... make choices that would reflect an intellegent grown woman.... set an example.

    2010 might be your year for changes. 2010 might be a good year to pair down, take inventory, and choose a life path for the future.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:54 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • So you are whining about what you don't have instead of cherishing the 13 yr old you do have? nice mom (yah that is sarcasm) you aborted two of them by whomever and now you want one with a man who doesn't want them. don't ya love karma?

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:09 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • Try to put into perspective that you are separate from a baby. You can have babies in your life but perhaps not a baby of yours now in your life. Hospital nurseries are great places to volunteer to hug babies. So are hospital pediatric wards to visit with kids, Sunday School nurseries and classes. Get your ds involved too and bf also. Your bf sounds very caring and compassionate. You're so lucky to have a partner like that. Remember your own worth apart from making babies. That, making babies, does not make you a good mom or good person. It's what you do that makes you good. If what you do with a baby makes you good then what you do with out a baby makes you good.

    Answer by lfl at 6:12 PM on Dec. 5, 2009

  • 2 abortions in one year?? god its called use birth control instead of walking into a clinic & aborting

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:23 PM on Dec. 5, 2009