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How do I get other kids to like my daughter ?

She is an only child and has never been able to get along with othe children. She's very bossy and sulks if she doesn't get her way. None of the kids in the neighborhood want anything to do with her and she really doesn't care..... excpet for situations like today, when there is a birthday party and all the other kids are invited except for her.

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VnAlanna

Asked by VnAlanna at 1:15 PM on Dec. 6, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (21)
  • You really can't get others to like her, unless you want to end up like that mother and the whole facebook dealio. You have to let her make friends in her own way and her own time. She will, she just hasn't met the right type of person she likes yet. Trust me, it's difficult for some kids to find their own way, but they do with time. Are there any activities she enjoys outside the home? Get her involved in something outside where she would be around kids that are to her own intellect.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 1:18 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • u dont get other kids to like ur child.. u said it urself ur child is bossy and sulks. well shes the one u have to work with,. the other kids have a reason to not like her if she is like that. she sounds like shes depressed! go get her to talk to someone
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:18 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • well maybe explain to her that other people don't like getting bossed around.... that's a lesson that will come in handy later in life too. tell her if she wants friends she has to act like a friend (you know like the golden rule sort of a thing)
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 1:19 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • Does she have other sensory or processing issues? I ask because I was an only child, but I also turned out to have "high-functioning" autism, which can be too-easily overlooked in girls, and "hidden" for years. I know why it's called high functioning, but when you live inside it, and everything you do involving other people is always wrong one way of another because of it, it really does not feel very functional at all. If you can completely rule that out (I have a link to a video at ABCnews that opened whole new worlds for me) then your best bet is to find ways she can learn to work with others first maybe, like volunteering places. And keeping social interactions limited to one other child at a time with guided activities at first, rather than the girls trying to figure out what to do. Maybe that will help, as well as reminding her that she does care when she is left out of things.
    roachiesmom

    Answer by roachiesmom at 1:27 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • You can't really expect a lot of kids to want to play with someone who is bossy and sulks. I wouldn't want to! Work on changing her behavior, and the problem will heal itself.
    StefanieN84

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:32 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • Get her involved in activites outside the home where she has to work as a team, heck try girl scouts! I loved it , my daughter loves it and the girls work together and it is about building friendships and working together.

    I also agree that sometimes we have to work on ourselves and the attitude we are showing the world before anything will change. Being bossy especially in this age group does not go over well with other kids.
    3_ring_circus_

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 1:32 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • I always came off as bossy and sulky and a lot of other negative things as a child (and still now, too), but it was due to a myriad collection of reasons -- I have trouble communicating my feelings into words and expressing them in ways that made sense to other people (yeah, and I used words like myriad conversationally which freaks people out), I have trouble processing social expectations, and I do need some things to be in a certain way or order or other strictures on events and activities...but when you are a kid, that often is seen as, well, just being "bossy and sulky." Oh and spoiled, too, for an only child. It's very bewildering to have people telling you all the time that you are all these things, and there you are with no real comprehension of what or how, or why they see you this way; or in the case of the ones you do get the "why" you still have no idea how to stop being that way.
    roachiesmom

    Answer by roachiesmom at 1:37 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • do you spoil her? DOES she get everything she wants? if so, STOP IT. who cares if she sulks? you have to draw the line. otherwise, she may just not know how to communicate effectively. take her to a pediatric counselor, who can help her with the skills to interact with kids her own age.
    missbreezy214

    Answer by missbreezy214 at 2:47 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • Well, I wouldn't like her either if she's bossy and sulky. That's HER problem, not the other kids'. You need to teach her how to behave in a way that other kids will WANT to be around her ie, not a bossy little brat.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

  • No offense, but YOU raised her to be bossy and sulky. Not all children who are "only's" are that way. My daughter is an only child, and she is in no way bossy and sulky. You need to figure out what you're doing wrong as far as your parenting skills, and get on the right path.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:27 PM on Dec. 6, 2009

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