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What is wrong with me?

i cant get my husband to have sex with me. I get all these excuses, i am tired, i got to work the next day, etc. Not sure what to think anymore.. Does this happen in marriages , must be me..


Asked by Anonymous at 3:52 AM on Dec. 7, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Maybe he is depressed. Maybe he is stressed out. Men shut down when they get stressed out. It doesn't mean he is cheating. Maybe just tell him that this is something you really want and that you are not willin to let it go but for the time being you will stop pushing the issue. Assure him though that after some time, if things have not changed, you will need to do something else. (ie. counseling, take a time out from the relationship...)

    Answer by IzzeAddy at 8:41 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • do u think he is cheating?
    do you notice change in money
    do u notice he goes out more
    do u notice he hides from u at times?
    does he stay longer hours at work
    has he cheated before?
    does he take care of him self better?

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:57 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Maybe he is just tired. The last two times I had sex with my husband I didn't want to. I've been really tired. He has gotten that way too. If work has been really crazy for him sometimes it's hard for us to find time. I know he wants me.

    How long has it been?

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:01 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • how long has it been? sometimes people go through dry spells. Not including deployments and other training times, the longest Dh and I have gone without is a week n a half. Some days I want it but he doesnt and vice versa. if its been a few months, then I would be a little worried

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 5:01 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • It's not just you, I have the same problem. I've checked all the signs he's not cheating he just prefers no sex.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:12 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • It only happens when they are cheating, flirting and thinking about someone else or just bored/tired with you/seeking other interests. But you more than anyone knows your own husband just try to figure it out. Best of luck to you.

    Answer by cditren at 5:59 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Your husband may very well be having some physical problem that precludes his ability to have sex. If that is the case, he is ashamed of it and does not want you to know. There are many medications that can cause impotence and several ailments that can, too, diabetes and high blood pressure among them. Stop thinking about this as just being your problem and approach it from the standpoint of concern for your husband. Tell him this is not normal behavior for a man and you are very concerned about his health. Go with him to see a doctor or if he's already taking drugs, ask for alternatives to the ones he is taking. Some men actually have low hormone levels just as women often do, but there are things that can be done. This is not a yours or mine problem; it is an our problem, so approach it from that viewpoint. Even stress can cause impotence, so do everything you can to make your home free from turmoil and stress.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:59 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • I feel the same way sometimes I work at a law firm and my husband is mechanic so our jobs are highly demanding and when I want it he is too tired and when he wants it I am too tired I would just let him know how you feel I mean I was always told that a key to a successful marriage is one that has a lot of communication

    Answer by lazo060109 at 12:02 PM on Dec. 7, 2009