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I'm I wrong?

Okay so my husband wants to have sex every day and sometimes twice a day. I'm currently 21wks with our 3rd child so I still get very tired so sometimes I tell him that I'm to tired or just not in the mood to have sex and ask if he wants me to do something else and he gets mad at me. He tells me that if we dont have sex he feels like I dont love him. How do I try to explain to him that I would like one day out of the week to just be taken care of without upsetting him?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:01 AM on Dec. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • how old is he..18? You dont love me anymore!!! please! I would pop my husband right upside the head
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:04 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • When a child comes along a dad sometimes feels pushed away (unloved) and with each child he feels more and more pushed out of mom's life so I see why they do this. Just keep telling him how much you love him. Tell him sex doesn't mean love and that you like showing him every day how much you love him in other ways. Then tell him that it would be nice if he showed you how much he loved you by respecting you being tired and not needing sex as much to prove anything. He just needs assurance that you love him so tell him, make him his favorite meals, tell him he rocks....maybe he'll be ok with that for a while!
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:07 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Tell your husband to respect you and your needs. My husband wanted this and he felt unloved. Truthfully there is many ways to express yourself besides sex. Make him feel as important as you feel about him. Maybe once and a while when you want it and feel energized have sex.
    iloveRiver

    Answer by iloveRiver at 10:10 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Um, I'm with Shay on this one. I can see how he may feel blah, bah, blah... but come on. Maybe I am insensitive but that would really irritate me. And this is his 3rd kid? I guess my response would be... 'Really? Cuz my body is tired, hurting and working 24/7 to make this baby... our baby... to build on the family that WE are making... in connection with the fact that I married you because I love you. Now go put your big boy pants on and do the dishes or walk up and down the basement steps 40 times doing laundy (for the family WE/I love) or cook some meals (and take the time to make them healthy for the family I LOVE) or get on the floor (when you are so freakin' tired you might fall asleep down there!) and play a board game with our kids or wrestle with them ORRRRR get up at 5:30am and make the healthy, balanced lunch I make for the husband I love every morning before work!' Everything I do is an expression of my love...
    movin_mommy

    Answer by movin_mommy at 10:15 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • With that in mind though... we do have a 3 day rule. He gets some lovin'. But if he were to ride me about this... I would have to wonder a little bit, um, what is it exactly that you love ME for?

    movin_mommy

    Answer by movin_mommy at 10:18 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Ok, I just had to post one more time! :) That last bit sort of looked bad! He is not starved! And it isn't a chore! But seriously, I love getting it on with my old man but I would be very disappointed if he were so insecure that he had to get laid 'to know I loved him'. We also have very open lines of communication and we tke each other very seriously. On occasion he will come home form a really hard day of work and say something like 'I wanna make love. It was a bad day and you make me feel right with the world.' And we do, he is bumped to the top of the to-do list ;) I know he needs me in many ways, including intimate and likewise, to feel close and good. But we both work hard to build this family and keep it healthy and he wouldn't undermind my need for rest for the sake of sex. And likewise there too... there are times when I am the one begging! ;) Just less often... heheheheee
    movin_mommy

    Answer by movin_mommy at 10:28 AM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • I think it is time he grew up some. He is the father of 3 kids for heavens sake. It is NOT all about him anymore. Sex is not the only way for a woman to show a man her love for him. I think he needs to take a look at all the other ways in which you show him you love him. Or he may just say that to get his way. If you think that is the case, tell him I love you, roll over and go to sleep. Sheece! Men!
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 2:23 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • He's just using that as an excuse to get some in my opinion.Playing the Love Card to make you feel obligated and guilty.He needs to grow up!
    TMJ121099

    Answer by TMJ121099 at 7:40 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

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