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Does anyone find it difficult communicating etc. with their teenage daughter? We just never see eye to eye anymore. We are always figting! I don't know what else to do.

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phelmick

Asked by phelmick at 3:04 PM on Dec. 7, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (7)
  • yes and no. i find that things go on with friends and instead of telling me she is sad she will just be very grouchy and mean.

    it is hard to do but time alone with out the cell phone helps a TON. it has to be a good amount of time because she has to get out of friend mode and back into family mode.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • It's common, that age is really difficult for both sides, parents and teenagers. Raising a teenager is very difficult and requires patience and will. You will get in a lot of agruments but try to solve your problems by talking about them. Let her say what she has to say about your arguments. Show her that her opinion matters to you and treat her like a young adult, not like a child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Yes, especially in the earlier teen years. Then they seem to outgrow that. I know, it's painful. For a while there, that's all it seemed like I did with my teenage daughters. But we'd always been so open and honest with each other all the time before. It was so heartbreaking. Just keep on talking to her, keep on reaching out, keep on showing her lots of love, no matter what. She'll come around.
    GoodMomma24-7

    Answer by GoodMomma24-7 at 3:16 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • It os very difficult but never give up! This too shall pass and when she becomes an adult, things will change, hang in there!
    older

    Answer by older at 4:11 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • That's life,and it's going to be like that for a while. If she keeps fighting you on things, don't argue back. Just "I'm the parent and that's the way it's gong to go" and move on. No matter how mad you two get at each other, just please, always tell her that you love her. When you're a teen you are starting a new part of your life, learning things about yourself, learning to voice your opinion, the world changes a lot when you hit that part of life, just as any other. The best thing you can do as a parent is hold your ground on issues, but be open and understanding about others. Keep communication open. I doesn't mean you have to bend to her whining, it means that you at least hear her out. That's all a lot of kids want, to be heard and to know that what they feel is at least being considered.
    BaisMom

    Answer by BaisMom at 5:20 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • Keep in mind that at her age she's getting ready to "leave the nest."

    I remember at that age I constantly fought with my parents, and tried very hard to find "my own way" without adult supervision.

    Encourage her independence...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:44 PM on Dec. 7, 2009

  • I have the same problem. This summer was really bad, she had a bf and didn't want to talk to me at all. I of course had lots of questions. But I found that when I stopped yelling and crying, two things I do well and a lot!! and tried to just talk to her it got better. A couple of times I knew something was up and she wasn't ready to talk about it I would just say, "when your ready I'm here". That works for her. She can gather her thoughts and feeling and then come to me. Sometimes I get the most out of her in the car, I know everyone says that, but it works. I also explained to her that I understood that she wants and needs her space but I let her know that it is hard for me to give that. So we are working on that ! If she is honest and fair with me, I'll be honest and fair with her. She knows what is expected of her and what happens if she breaks the few rules she has. Good luck, we all need it!!
    wallmom1

    Answer by wallmom1 at 1:21 PM on Dec. 8, 2009

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