Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Does your baby sleep better now that they have learned to self sooth?

I have just this week taught my dd of 9 months to self sooth and she has slept SO much better each of those nights and for her naps. I just put her down when she is tired now and she goes to sleep, at first it took about 10 min of crying then about 5 min then about 2 in and now sometimes she doesn't even cry, she just lays her head down and goes to sleep. Yesterday for her nap she played with all her passys for alittle while in her crib then she decided she was tired and layed down and went to sleep. I can not believe this is the same baby! She has been rocked to sleep every night almost since she was born and she fights sleep so bad ( or used to). I hope I have done a good thing. I waited until I thought she was old enough t handle a little crying and so she wouldn't feel abandoned or anything. How do you all feel about self soothing?


Asked by Anonymous at 7:18 AM on Dec. 8, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

This question is closed.
Answers (42)
  • downright competitiveness rather than parents making choices that work for their family and their children. I actually feel badly for new mothers these days because it seems that every choice is made out to be life or death and if you do not subscribe to the "new" way of parenting you are a failure. I will say for the hundredth time- you have to parent in a way you can be successful. You have to follow up on what you feel in your gut. You can not be beaten into submission by people who throw out stats and studies that for the most part probably do not mirror what is going on in your life. A happy/stable family is what kids need. When you read about people "gone wrong" you seldom hear - well, they were FF or allowed to CIO, you more than likely hear-broken homes, lack of resources, an absent parent. I just think we need to cut new Mom's a break and allow them to trust their instincts over some new study or book. JMO!

    Answer by wildboyz1994 at 9:22 PM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • We never let our son cry it out. Babies don't learn to self soothe, they just learn their parents aren't coming to comfort them and give up. We never had a hard time with our son sleeping. When he was smaller I'd either nurse or rock him to sleep, and now that he is bigger I'll lay down with him in bed and nurse him until he falls asleep. We cosleep, so as he started to wake up in the middle of the night I'd nurse him and he'd fall right back to sleep. He'd actually never fully wake up because his needs were met so immediately.

    Answer by PhilsBabyMama at 9:03 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • To Philsbabymama-- Well great for you but I firmly DON'T believe in cosleeping (all the time unless they are sick or something) that is how a lot of babies die....and I KNOW she does self soothe because I SEE it. She fusses a for minutes then lays down and then she goes to sleep...because she is tired. She also knows that I will come get her if I know she really needs me not because she just wants me, thats how you create spoiled bratts. I meet all her needs and I can read her cries so I know if she is hurt or hungry or whatever....and I also know when she is just mad that we put her down.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:16 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • Scientific Benefits of Co-sleeping
    Popular media has tried to discourage parents from sharing sleep with their babies, calling this worldwide practice unsafe. Medical science, however, doesn’t back this conclusion. In fact, research shows that co-sleeping is actually safer than sleeping alone. Here is what science says about sleeping with your baby:
    Sleep more peacefully
    Research shows that co-sleeping infants virtually never startle during sleep and rarely cry during the night, compared to solo sleepers who startle repeatedly throughout the night and spend 4 times the number of minutes crying 1. Startling and crying releases adrenaline, which increases heart rate and blood pressure, interferes with restful sleep and leads to long term sleep anxiety.


    Answer by PhilsBabyMama at 9:22 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • Stable physiology
    Studies show that infants who sleep near to parents have more stable temperatures 2, regular heart rhythms, and fewer long pauses in breathing compared to babies who sleep alone 3. This means baby sleeps physiologically safer.

    Decreases risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome
    Worldwide research shows that the SIDS rate is lowest (and even unheard of) in countries where co-sleeping is the norm, rather than the exception 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. Babies who sleep either in or next to their parents’ bed have a fourfold decrease in the chance of SIDS 10. Co-sleeping babies actually spend more time sleeping on their back or side 1 which decreases the risk of SIDS. Further research shows that the carbon dioxide exhaled by a parent actually works to stimulate baby’s breathing 11.


    Answer by PhilsBabyMama at 9:23 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • Long term emotional health
    Co-sleeping babies grow up with a higher self-esteem, less anxiety, become independent sooner, are better behaved in school 12, and are more comfortable with affection 13. They also have less psychiatric problems 14.

    Safer than crib sleeping
    The Consumer Product Safety Commission published data that described infant fatalities in adult beds. These same data, however, showed more than 3 times as many crib related infant fatalities compared to adult bed accidents 15. Another recent large study concluded that bed sharing did NOT increase the risk of SIDS, unless the mom was a smoker or abused alcohol 16.

    Answer by PhilsBabyMama at 9:23 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • need to find updated information and learn to stick to the question asked. I strongly suggest a reading comprehension course.

    It also helps with credibility if you actually provide links to the STUDY and not simply some article written about a study or studies.

    It is no longer recommended for parents to co-sleep. It is recommended that parents put the crib in their room so they are close by, but not to actually cosleep. Incidents of suffocation are much higher with cosleepers than with any other group.

    While you're putting out information that no one asked for, it would help if you provided it ALL, not just the part that fits your particular beliefs.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • Our kids slept pretty well from the very beginning, but we always put them down a little drowsy. Oh, they also slept better on their tummies, so we put them that way to sleep.

    Babies do learn to self soothe. I know ours slept much better after we took away the pacifiers and they had to soothe themselves. They went from waking several times a night looking for that stupid pacifier to sleeping SOLIDLY through the entire night. (we always considered them as sleeping through because as soon as they had the pacifier, they were right back feedings or diaper changes required)

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:31 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • I'm not telling anyone to co-sleep. I know the original question wasn't about that, anyway, but the response I got had some inaccuracies that I just wanted to clear up for everyone reading. If you actually followed the link I provided you would see that all the studies are clearly sited and listed at the bottom of the article. :) By the way, it wasn't just one study, it was sixteen studies.

    If someone wants to allow their child to cry it out, that's fine, but the OP asked what our thoughts were on the matter. I'm just stating mine.

    Here is more info on the matter. (Again, studies are clearly referenced)

    Answer by PhilsBabyMama at 9:51 AM on Dec. 8, 2009

  • No, she didn't ask about crying it out. She asked if after a baby learned to self soothe, did s/he sleep better. That has nothing to do with a question on crying it out.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:57 AM on Dec. 8, 2009