Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I need help on finding out what i have to do to get my sons father to sign his rights over?

My sons father has been out of the picture for 4 years and my son is 5. I have been with this guy that I have been dating for 8 months now and everything is going good and we live together. My son loves him and calls him dad. He doesn't pay child support or nothing and has never helped me out in any way. So please help me

Answer Question
 
kyrie0406

Asked by kyrie0406 at 12:16 AM on Dec. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Call a lawyer
    randmmom05

    Answer by randmmom05 at 12:22 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • Go to the court house and have your bf get a adoption order, they will mail it or serve it to his real father and if he wants he will sign it if not..your stuck. Have you tried to get child support? If you are on food stamps they usually go after the father instead or should I say so you dont have to get food stamps. Cooperate with the CPS office fully.
    Theone3608

    Answer by Theone3608 at 8:18 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • Your bf doesn't need to sign adoption papers in order for the biological father to terminate rights. You will need a lawyer to do a TPR (termination of parental rights), and requirements vary state to state. In NC, the father must "abandon" the child for 6 months in order for you to pursue a TPR.

    Good luck!
    kitkabob

    Answer by kitkabob at 9:36 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • You can file for abandoment to get the BF's rights terminated if it has been zero contact from the BF (it can sometimes only be 6 months or a year of no contact). A s far as I know you can't get his rights terminated without someone else willing to adopt your son in the place of the BP. So, only his step Dad could do it, so you would have to be married first. But, quite honestly I would not pursure having someone who you have only been with for 8 months to adopt your son. If the BF is completely out of the picture, then there is no rush. Take things at a slow & healthy pace for your family, IMO there is no reason to rush it unless you think that BF will come back into the picture & in that case there would not be much you can do about it because it's almost impossible to terminate a parents rights when they are fighting it. I just personally believe that 8 months is too short of a time period to pursue this. cont'd

    BubbaLuva

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 10:39 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • If your relationship with your boyfriend withstands the test of time he can still be a big part of your sons life even be his "Dad" whether or not the BF comes back into the picture or not. Any man who drops out of their child's life for 4 years is a piece of shit but, that piece of shit has rights whether we like it or not. Regardless of that, I would just not rush an adpotion with a person you've only been involved with for 8 months. Give it time, I hope everything works out.
    BubbaLuva

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 10:44 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • I agree with BubbaLuva..In illinois it is much easier to have rights terminated if someone else is willing to step up and be willing to adopt your child. 8 months isnt a long time and if you guys break up and he has adopted your son then he will have rights to see him every other wkend. Since you have full rights right now you need to think long and hard about giving someone that power and the rights to your son. You cant take it back once it is done and it is very hard to terminate someones rights who is fighting it. I would wait a few years before making it legal with your new boyfriend.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 10:47 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN