Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What do I do? :(

My almost 2 year old's father and I are not friends. We split about 4 or 5 months ago, and he will not help me with ANYTHING. Neither of us can afford to have a custody battle, so we have been splitting our times with our daughter. He takes her 3 days a week I take her 4, I do not have a job, he has two... Im wondering if the best thing to do is to let him take her more often and to get on my feet. He isnt a very good parent. When she is over at his house (he lives with his mother) She is usually watching tv, or playing with toys by herself. He doesnt give her baths very often, (He always brings her home a mess) He is very messy and doesnt keep his home very clean... I just dont know what to do. I am running out of people to take care of me money wise, and I need to take action. I just dont know what to do :( He will not help me pay for daycare if I get a job, and I cant afford it either. Any advice? :(

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:15 AM on Dec. 9, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (4)
  • Call your local women's resource center and ask them to give you references of who to call to apply for day care assistance; they also usually have a list of avail jobs or they can refer you to your local Jobs Etc...

    Good Luck.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • The advice above is good. You should also file for child support; the public assistance office should be able to help.

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:13 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • get PA, file for child support, if he is a bad dad (as far as caring for her physical and social needs) do not let him have the kid more, let him have the kid less and get paid more in CS (esp with his 2 jobs) good luck to you!

    Answer by AmaliaD at 7:51 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • Definitely file for PA and child support. You can stop PA's clock by going to school, preferably full time. Take career tests to see where your strengths and weaknesses lie. Also file for Section 8 housing. The waiting list may be long or short, depending on your state but well worth the wait expense wise. He doesn't have a say as far as whether he'll pay for daycare. I would definitely slow up his visits until he paid better attention to your daughter's needs.

    Answer by Ewadun at 8:14 AM on Dec. 9, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.