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Ok so how do I go about taking away teens I pod?

Well my 16 yr. olds behavior has been escalating out of control lately .He looses his temper over trivial things and while I understand that may be kind of normal for his age It is NOT ok for him to scream at me call me an f***ing bitch,and get physical with me .so last night that is what happened AGAIN. I have finally decided that's enough and when he comes home from school today I am going to explain to him that because he talked to me that way he is going to lose one of his privileges.I am going to give him the choice of either his I pod or his phone.I am a single parent right now so no, I can't talk to his father about this...my question is... what should I do if he refuses to hand one of them over and how long do you think would be appropriate to keep it? And please ..no bashing, I am not a bad parent by any means just new to all this and alone.

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flowerchid72

Asked by flowerchid72 at 3:30 PM on Dec. 9, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Level 5 (83 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • Id say take both away and if his behavior doesnt straighten up and he doesnt start respecting his mother and family, then he's going to boot camp. And Id also make him do some volunteer work for a month or give him a choice of a few different hobbies to take up while hes straightening up his act. pick something that will help him get his aggression out without harming anyone- like running or playing a sport or something along those lines
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:34 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • I am not going to bash you. but You will not like what I am about to say. If your son was my son. And he acted like that. All his privileges would be taken away. You are being nice to him IMO.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 3:35 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • First of all I would have handled that situation when he was still mad and it was fresh. SInce it already happened and now consequences are going to happen, I would take both of them. He can hand them over or you can take them. Be firm and do not blink or give in at all!!! He has a choice to make, it can be good or bad. Be ready for both. Praise or discipline.
    When my son was 16 (he is now 21) he hit me and cussed me and I simply took him to the ground and called the sheriff. I know all parents are different. I know how hard it is being a single mom also. Just tell him. Stand your ground with him. Good luck.
    JLynn0871

    Answer by JLynn0871 at 3:37 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • PS...Forgot to say. It would be months before he would get the stuff back. Depending on his attitude.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 3:37 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • Actually louise2....I love your answer I thought that too.I just don't know how to handle his reaction. And I know he has a lot of anger about his dad leaving so I have kinda gone easy on him I guess.
    flowerchid72

    Answer by flowerchid72 at 3:40 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • I'd probably take them both away as well. I don't think you should give him the choice. I don't know you're son to know what his reaction might be - but I don't think I would ask my son which he prefers, I would take the one I know means the most to him or both if they were equally important. He can earn them back by showing more respect to you and helping around the house or something. I think you should also tell him that you have feelings like everyone else and when he says those things it hurts you. I've had this talk with my 15 yr old and it does help sometimes.
    If he refuses you could take away the door to his bedroom...no respect = no privacy. There are lots of other things you can take away if he is going to refuse to accept the punishment you are giving him.
    blessedwboysx3

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 3:43 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • Ahh, angry teen boys can be so much fun. First let me say that when he gets physical with you, you need to put your foot down and remind him in a very firm voice that YOU are HIS MOTHER and WILL NOT allow him to treat you that way, it is unacceptable behavior. My son is 15 and has been bigger than I am for a very long time, I DO NOT allow him to intimidate me or talk to me that way. He tried, once, and I reminded him that Im MOM. There are consequences to every behavior, and unacceptable behavior has bigger consequences. I would sit him down and have a very long talk, as calmly as possible. I would also take both his phone and IPOD until he improves in his behavior, at least a week, but you are the best judge of how long it takes for your son to come around. He owes you an apology, and I would demand it. Also, tell him that as long as his behavior is like it is, he will have NO privledges, and I mean NONE, no TV, etc
    SuperMomof3kids

    Answer by SuperMomof3kids at 3:47 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • And I know he has a lot of anger about his dad leaving so I have kinda gone easy on him I guess. Quoting flowerchid72
    I have 6 sons 2 over 18 and 4 under. When me and DH divorced it was super hard. I can relate to you SO much. I took it easy on my boys as well but when I saw behavior changes that were not good then I started "depending on them" for repairing things. I remember once I loosened screws on a cabinet door and asked my son if he could repair it for me and I rewarded him with his favorite dinner. I would always acknowledge his good works to everyone. Treating him like man persay. He would always drive wherever we went. I let him handle alot more stuff. You both have to stick together and not stray one another.
    JLynn0871

    Answer by JLynn0871 at 3:54 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • You don't have to walk on egg shells. If my son called me a f#cking bitch and got physical with me I would smash his cell phone and i-pod with a hammer in front of him. Then I would leave military school brochures lying around the house.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • When he leaves his ipod or phone around you need to take them then. If you ask him for them he will probably refuse because he is already getting physical.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:00 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

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