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how to stop my 3 yr old from hitting kids at preschool

Ok im having a dilemma... my 3 year was has been in preschool since Sept and we have good days and bad days and alot of times I hear of her hitting the other kids and throwing tantrums. I dont want my child to be the outcast at school but I also i dont want her being a bully. She gets attention at home all the time and is put in timeout when she hits her sister. But i dont know how to handle her when shes at school and hits... any other parents going thru this?

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Merediths_Mommy

Asked by Merediths_Mommy at 7:12 PM on Dec. 9, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 3 (15 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • what do you mean by "i don't want my child being the outcast at school"
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 7:14 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • i dont want her being the kid who has no friends and gets picked on because she hits the other kids
    Merediths_Mommy

    Answer by Merediths_Mommy at 7:25 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • well i'm the parent who has the problem on the other end. My son is the one being hit. He is 5 and in prek. I've taught him to not hit back and to ask the child to stop and to tell the teacher first...and if it continues to then hit back. At my parent/teacher conference last week i asked his teacher how he does dealing with these situations and she said he is fine (because i think he can get overly sensitive) she said that they teach the kids to work these type of issues out on their own...by apologizing and dealing with it at the moment
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 7:34 PM on Dec. 9, 2009

  • well the best thing you can do it communicate your concern over and over and over. to your dd, to the teachers, set up a meeting with the teachers, tell him how upset you are, how you want her to learn to fit in before K... get a system in place for whoever is watching her class to record if she hits someone. when she has good days reward her immediately and gush and gush to her about how proud you are, let her get whatever she wants for dinner, or watch whatever she wants on tv. when it becomes more consistent for her not to hit, and you cannot afford to eat out everyday, get a sticker chart with at first 5 days. when she has 5 days with no hitting she get a reward, the next chart should have more and more days expected before she gets the reward. talk to her teaachers every day about it. ask her about it when you pick her up. maybe teach her things she can do to vent her feelings before she hits. cont.
    AmaliaD

    Answer by AmaliaD at 3:08 PM on Dec. 10, 2009

  • also try taking a few hours off of work to watch her in her classroom... maybe there is bad things going on that are leading her to do this. maybe there is favoritism, selfish kids, other kids who hit and arent caught... see what is really going on and Do not tell the school before you do your observation. you are a paying customer and have the right to do it. they may raise eyebrows but your kid is worth it. best of luck to you, all kids struggle in some way in schools. dont take it to heart, just attack the problem.
    AmaliaD

    Answer by AmaliaD at 3:10 PM on Dec. 10, 2009

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