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Rebelling 13Year Old!! Any Advise??

Please Help..... My son is 13 and he now is telling me how he is going to live his life! Hes such a smart good kid! But he is hanging around the wrong crowd and is getting a few bad grades! He's still getting a's and b's on his report card, but on papers and quizzes he got a d and and f! and he thinks its no big deal! I've had him punished for a month with no electronics = and no going over friends! But he's become use to being punished and doesn't care anymore! I feel that i don't have a close relationship with him and he wont tell me anything about his life! I want to be close with him!...

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MyMomsHomeBiz

Asked by MyMomsHomeBiz at 4:19 PM on Dec. 11, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (4)
  • belt, soap, and restrictions
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:21 PM on Dec. 11, 2009

  • This is so tough. I can tell you what I think that I would do in this position.

    Take your son out to lunch. Have a real conversation. Ask him about school: what is his favorite subject? who is his favorite teacher? how does he feel about going to high school next year? Then get to the serious stuff: what are his plans for after high school? What does he think he wants to be when he grows up?

    Listen very carefully to his answers, and I suspect that you will learn what he needs.

    Good luck; I hope that this helps.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 4:22 PM on Dec. 11, 2009

  • keeping open communication with your kids is very important. This is why i believe having SOME kind of friendship with your kids is important. I've heard parents say "we're your parents not your friends" But, i think if our children are more able to relate to us as a friend, then they would be more open to talk to us & tell us whats going on without the fear of being punished.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 4:35 PM on Dec. 11, 2009

  • I feel ya pain having recently lived through this. I took my 15 year old son out to dinners, enrolled him (during the Thanksgiving holiday) in a teen runaway shelter for 2 weeks, got him a Big Brother from the Big Brother/Big Sister Foundation, took him to church regularly, beat his butt (while the police stood by in my house), suspended privileges, discontinued allowance, and got him into counseling. Honestly, none of these things worked. My son's friendship with the wrong crowd meant more to him.He stubbornly resisted me and continued to get progressively worse. My final solution: I relinquished sole custody to his Father. I'm very blessed that his Dad is a good, God-fearing, hardworking man. I firmly believe that it takes a man to teach a boy how to be a man. I don't believe that, as a single Mom that I failed my son or gave up on him. We talk daily long distance. It was about doing what works best for your child.
    Ewadun

    Answer by Ewadun at 11:06 PM on Dec. 11, 2009

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